


Fire Mountain Fury

by xXxdumpsterfirexXx



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: AU, Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Chi-Chi is an active character, Chi-Chi is ripped AU, F/M, Goku's wife is ripped don't @ me, Original Character(s), saiyan saga
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-03-08 01:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 28,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18885754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXxdumpsterfirexXx/pseuds/xXxdumpsterfirexXx
Summary: After finding out that her son has been abducted by her now-dead husband's sworn enemy, Chi-Chi takes it upon herself to get Gohan home no matter the cost - even if the cost is having to face the Saiyan menace personally. AU where Chi-Chi is ripped and takes no prisoners because it's what I want more than anything else in the world. <3





	1. Kame House Aftermath

Chi-Chi set her sights on Master Roshi’s island, vision tinted red with fury. Goku was going to get it - worse than he’d ever gotten it before. Honestly, the nerve of it all: stealing Gohan away overnight for god-knew-why without so much as a phone call. Didn’t he care about Gohan’s entrance exams, or his future at all for that matter?

“Chi-Chi, slow down, you’re going to crash into Kame House!” her father cried from the back seat.

“I know what I’m doing, Dad,” Chi-Chi snapped. She pushed the accelerator down further, the speed drawing ten-foot waves out of the ocean as the vehicle hurtled towards the island. “It’ll serve that Master Roshi right for letting Goku and Gohan stay so late - he’s the grossest, most irresponsible old man I’ve ever met, and he needs to learn his lesson!”

The Ox King whimpered something, but it was lost to Chi-Chi between the screaming engines and the blood pumping in her ears. Deftly, she slammed on the breaks, but the vehicle by no means lost its momentum. Chi-Chi yanked on the controls, pulling the nose of the car up towards the sky and twisting it away from Kame House with millimeters to spare.

After all, if Goku was inside the house, Chi-Chi wanted to strangle him with her bare hands, not take him down via vehicular manslaughter. Gohan could be inside, too.

Roshi, Bulma, Oolong, Turtle, and - Chi-Chi saw with a flash of rage - Krillin came running out of Kame House.

“Hey everybody!” said the Ox King, grinning wide and waving as though his son-in-law wasn’t about to be flogged within an inch of his life. He wasted no time lumbering out of the car to greet them, and fell into a bow before Master Roshi. “It’s good to see you again, Master - how have you been?”

“I’ve seen better days than this if the look on your daughter’s face is anything to go by,” Roshi said grudgingly.

Chi-Chi fixed him with a glare and leapt out of the vehicle.

“Oh, she’s just upset because Goku didn’t call last night. Say, speaking of, where’s my little grandson? I haven’t seen him in a while and I owe him a big old hug, y’know?” said the Ox King. He gave a hearty laugh that was cut short by Chi-Chi shoving him out of the way to grab Roshi by the front of his shirt.

“Hey, take it easy, Chi-Chi,” Oolong shouted, hiding behind Bulma’s leg.

“Y-yeah, Roshi didn’t have anything to do with it!” Krillin added quickly.

“Chi-Chi! That’s my old master there, be careful,” said the Ox King.

Chi-Chi ignored them all in favor of violently shaking Master Roshi as though she could rattle the information she wanted out of him. “Talk, old man! Where’s my husband? Where’s my son? I got some  _ great _ news I wanna share with ‘em,” she said through gritted teeth.

Master Roshi laughed in a vain attempt to diffuse the fury permeating the air around Chi-Chi. It did nothing but make her swell with rage, and she shook him harder.

“Great news, you say? Why, that sounds wonderful. What is it?” asked Roshi.

“The news is that they get to live if Goku can man up for five seconds and face me!” Chi-Chi roared into Roshi’s face.

Someone put a hand on her shoulder, and Chi-Chi moved to sock them in the face but froze when she saw that it was Bulma. “As much as I would love to see you beat Master Roshi into an oozing pulp, it’ll have to wait until later,” Bulma said, evenly but with a heavy note in her voice that made Chi-Chi’s blood run cold. “You see, you’re not going to be able to give Goku that ‘news’ no matter what. Because…” Bulma’s voice hitched, but she pressed on, “... because he’s dead.”

* * *

Chi-Chi’s eyes were fixed pointedly at the mug of tea in her hands. She focused on the heat of it, which permeated her skin and warmed her through to the bone. It was all she could look at or think of in Kame House that didn’t make her want to burn it to the ground.

“So let me get this straight:” Chi-Chi said, not daring to look at anything but her tea lest she beat whomever she made eye-contact with first to death in her rage, “My husband is an alien from outer space, sent to Earth for the sole purpose of destroying the planet, his alien brother abducted my four-year-old son and threatened to destroy Earth if he didn’t, and now my Goku is dead and my son - and please correct me if I misunderstood this detail -  _ has been kidnapped by King Piccolo?” _

Her eyes flashed and Chi-Chi caught sight of Roshi, Krillin, Oolong, and her father lined up against far wall, all fidgeting in fear and rigidly stiff, as if in a police line-up.

It was Krillin who finally managed to answer. “Er - yes, well-”

“And at  _ no point, _ throughout this  _ entire  _ ordeal, _ none _ of you thought to give me a ring and tell me what was going on?” demanded Chi-Chi.

Krillin gulped. “I, uh, well I tried to tell you after the fact, Chi-Chi, but-” Krilling squeaked as he was cut off by a mug of scaldingly-hot tea hurtling across the sitting room, aimed squarely at his head. Any normal human would have been hit and given second-degree burns, and Krillin only dodged in time due to his superhuman reflexes.

Chi-Chi was on her feet and seething. Her ki was ablaze, radiating furious pressure that made Krillin, Roshi, and the Ox King cringe further against the wall. Even without being able to feel energy, Bulma and Oolong both knew better than to get too close to Chi-Chi at the moment.

Everyone in Kame House braced themselves for an outburst, but suddenly the pressure vanished as Chi-Chi took a deep breath.

The others shared a look of confusion. “Chi-Chi?” dared Bulma.

Wordlessly, Chi-Chi started for the exit. Oolong screamed - he was in her path on the way to the door - and scurried out of the way.

“Chi-Chi, wait - where are you going?” Bulma asked, chasing after Chi-Chi across the sandy shore of Roshi’s island.

The very image of composure, Chi-Chi turned to face Bulma. “I’m going to go get my son back,” she said evenly.

The others dared follow the two women out of Kame House, each more disoriented than the last about the direction the day was taking.

“Get him back? How are you going to find him?” asked Bulma. “I don’t know if you can sense energy like the guys, but even if you can, Piccolo probably took him hundreds - thousands - of miles away…”

“A-and even if you could find them,” started Krillin, making sure to keep Bulma between himself and Chi-Chi, “what are you gonna do against Piccolo? He’s probably the strongest person on the planet right now!”

Chi-Chi  _ humphed, _ folding her arms over her chest. “You all have so little faith in me. Fine. I figured I’d have to take care of this myself from the get-go,” she said. Chi-Chi hopped into her car, turning it on and drowning out her father and the others’ objections with the sound of engines rumbling to life.

“If you’re not going to help me, at least do this: find the dragon balls and wish Goku back to life. Dad, you take care of his body in the meantime,” Chi-Chi ordered, her tone beckoning no argument. “I’ll be home with Gohan as soon as I can.”

“Chi-Chi, no!” pleaded the Ox King, but it was too late. Chi-Chi slammed her foot against the accelerator and spun the car around, taking off across the water and splashing everyone on the island in the process.

In moments, she was just a dark speck against the horizon, and her friends could only stand on the beach and watch - soaking wet.

It was the Ox King who finally broke the silence. “Anyone got a car I can borrow? Chi-Chi was my ride home,” he said.


	2. The Scourge of Korin Tower

Regardless of how much she would have loved to get right to the search, Chi-Chi had to make a stop as the house first. She couldn’t hope to face Piccolo without armor, and forget about even finding them without a snack for the road.

After loading a capsule with food and other supplies - not to mention some reading material for Gohan, when she finally found him - Chi-Chi started rifling through closets for her old helmet. It had properties that helped her focus ki into a physical blast, and had been a great tool for self-defense as a child, but she hadn’t worn it in years. She cursed herself for not giving it to Gohan, just in case, but she figured it was too big for him anyway. Plus it had a giant detachable blade on top, and she’d be worried about him cutting himself.

Eventually she found it stowed away in a box full of Gohan’s baby-clothes and other keepsakes. Chi-Chi tried it on, but it wouldn’t fit over her skull.

“Stupid Demon Blacksmiths,” cursed Chi-Chi, kicking it across the room. “They can make a magic laser helmet, but they can only make it to fit a little girl? Useless…” She settled for a pair of swords her father had given to Goku as wedding present, and made her way back to the car.

The real problem now was where to begin looking. Chi-Chi leaned back in the driver’s seat with her feet up on the dashboard, considering. She couldn’t say she really knew that much about Piccolo, besides that he was evil and connected to Kami, so how could she fathom where he’d hide her son?

It occurred to her that it was impossible to make a guess as to where to begin. The world was too big, Piccolo was too quick, and Chi-Chi was all on her own. But if she couldn’t guess, than she’d have to ask someone who could.

With fresh resolve, Chi-Chi started off towards Korin Tower.

* * *

 

“Well, well, well, it seems we’ve got some visitors,” Korin hummed absently as Krillin hauled himself through the entrance and collapsed on the floor, followed by Yamcha, and Tien with Chiaotzu on his back. Yajirobe grunted his acknowledgement from his seat beside Korin.

“About time you guys showed up,” said Yajirobe. “I’ve been waiting for like, three days. What, did you try to get up Korin Tower on a unicycle or somethin’?”

Tien gave a short laugh, which Chiaotzu joined in on. “That sounds like excellent training, but no. Chiaotzu and I had a few… setbacks… on the way here.”

Yamcha and Krillin laughed, and sang in unison, “ _Tien’s got a girlfriend.”_

“She’s a piece of work, too,” Krillin added with a snicker.

Tien turned bright red and grumbled at them to stop, and thankfully Korin chimed in. “She couldn’t be as much work as that other lady that was up here,” he said.

Tien, Yamcha, Krillin, and Chiaotzu all sobered up at that, and Yajirobe shuddered at the memory.

“Geez, the first girl to visit Korin Tower in forever and all she does is stomp your tail and knee me in the kidney. I don’t know how Goku puts up with her, honestly,” Yajirobe said.

Suddenly, Krillin was on his feet. “Wait, you mean Chi-Chi’s here?” he demanded.

“No way, since when did she have it in her to climb Korin Tower?” asked Yamcha.

Chiaotzu hummed as he considered. “Well, she was one of the quarter-finalists at the World Martial Arts Tournament, so she must be strong, right?”

Yamcha blushed, having forgotten about that entirely. “Well, I - I mean, it’s still difficult!”

“It it, though? I mean, every one of us just did exactly that in under a day,” said Tien, all three eyes squinting a Yamcha. “Yajirobe does it all the time. I think the standards for what constitutes ‘difficult’ have shifted a bit.”

“Hey, watch it, tri-clops. I’ll eat you alive.”

Yamcha huffed. “Whatever. Anyway, it’s no place for a girl, is my point. What’d you do with her, Korin?” he asked, trying to move the focus of the conversation away from himself.

Korin didn’t answer immediately, but shared a prolonged look with Yajirobe.

“Um. Sure is a lot of not answering my question going on,” commented Yamcha.

Chiaotzu gasped. “Yajirobe, you ate Chi-Chi! Master Korin, how could you let him?”

Yajirobe was on his feet in a moment. “You have no proof, tiny man!”

Before accusations could escalate any further, Korin was shaking his head. “No, no, no, that’s not it, Chiaotzu. Nothing happened to Chi-Chi. She’s fine. I think,” he said.

“What happened to her? Where is she?” asked Tien. “Did she go home, or…?”

Korin sighed. “She went upstairs to see Kami, same as you guys,” he explained. At the group’s shocked expressions, he went on. “I put her through a few tests first, of course. But like Yajirobe said, she stomped my tail and took my bell, and she was on her way to Kami’s before you could say ‘senzu’. She was determined to talk to him, and neither I nor the threat of death could stop her. Certainly _Yajirobe_ couldn’t.” Korin finished with a pointed look at his friend.

“Aren’t you supposed to be the master, here?” snapped Yajirobe. “What was I supposed to do, hit a girl? Yeah right. Unlike you, Korin, I actually have some honor.”

“Why the hell do I even keep you around?” Korin asked.

Krillin cleared his throat loudly, not at all interested in the petty quarrel unraveling before him. “Speaking of Kami, we need to get up to the Lookout,” he said. In a more serious tone, he went on, “I’m sure you’ve heard of what’s happened on Earth, Master Korin. With Goku, and his - his brother, Raditz.”

Korin nodded sagely. “The Saiyans. Chi-Chi told me, yes, and they’re quickly approaching Earth,” Korin said. “But you understand I can’t just send you up to the Lookout all willy-nilly, right? If you don’t prove yourself beforehand, and you die on the way up, I’ll have that on my conscience.”

Tien stood his ground, his stance radiating determination. “Whatever test you have, Master Korin, we’ll pass it,” he said.

“Yeah! If Chi-Chi can do it, so can we,” Yamcha added with a confident smirk.

Krillin and Chiaotzu punched the air, whooping in unison.

Korin smirked, his eyes opening just enough to glint mischievously in the afternoon sun. “Good. Yajirobe, would you please go fetch some bells for me?”

* * *

 

Chi-Chi hoisted herself onto the Lookout and immediately collapsed, her muscles sore from her journey not only up Korin Tower, but from gripping the power pole for hours as it extended up to her destination. Her chest rose and fell quickly as she struggled for breath - the air was so thin - and she could only believe Goku had endured three years of training on the Lookout specifically because he was Goku instead of anyone else.

“My, what have we here?” marveled an unfamiliar voice.

Chi-Chi sat up quickly, and struggled to her feet.

It wasn’t Kami, but a short and portly man in a turban, with skin blacker than any night sky and eyes that seemed to look right into Chi-Chi’s soul. She suppressed a shudder, and realized that it must be Mr. Popo. Goku had told her about him, the caretaker of the Lookout, but she’d always imagined Mr. Popo was a human. Not - well - _whatever_ Mr. Popo was.

“You’re Popo, right?” Chi-Chi asked. “Where’s Kami? I need to talk to him.”

“Of course,” Mr. Popo said, setting his watering can down on the tile beside the flowerbed. He took a few paces towards Chi-Chi, and she would have taken another step back - but that would have her tumbling off of the Lookout, surely to her death. He came to a stop a few paces from her. “However… I cannot let you do that unless you can prove Master Korin deemed you worthy of-”

A bell smacked Mr. Popo in the face and bounced across the tile with a series of too-cheerful jingles.

“There, that should be sufficient. Where’s Kami?” demanded Chi-Chi. “I’m kind of in a hurry here.”

Mr. Popo’s gaze shifted between the bell on the floor and Chi-Chi. “Very well, though I would advise you to check your attitude before meeting Kami. He’s a very important-”

“I know, I’ve met him before, he’s very important and very green. Can I _please_ talk to him?” Chi-Chi said, more exasperated than furious. Two days climbing Korin Tower, hours spent chasing Korin and Yajirobe around for a damn bell, an eternity clinging to the power pole for dear life - she just wanted to find her son.

Mr. Popo _humphed_ and started towards the building on the opposite side of the Lookout, and Chi-Chi followed.

“Kami, someone is here to see you,” Mr. Popo called as they approached.

“Ah, yes - the Z Warriors, was it? I’ve been expecting- oh, hello,” Kami said, recoiling a bit as he emerged from the shadows and saw Chi-Chi. She scowled.

_All-knowing guardian, my ass. Oh, I hope he can help me find Gohan…_

“Hi, I’m Chi-Chi. Daughter of the Ox King? You trained my husband for three years?” Chi-Chi said. “We met at the World Martial Arts Tournament about five years ago. I need your help.”

Kami nodded sagely, one hand behind his back and the other gripping his staff. “Yes, I remember you. You were a spirited fighter - and you must still be, if your presence here is any indication,” he said. Kami frowned, studying Chi-Chi. “And, if you don’t mind my asking, for what purpose did you come to see me? If you’d like to know how Goku is doing in Otherworld, he’s travelling along Snake Way to train with King Kai. By the time the Saiyans arrive, he should be strong enough that…”

The expression on Chi-Chi’s face finally seemed to sink in, and Kami trailed off.

“Your son,” he said.

Chi-Chi nodded. “I was told that Piccolo has him, and frankly, I want him back. I figured if anyone knew where to find them, it would be you,” she said. Her resolve cracked and she bit back a sob - of terror for her son’s life, or in relief that she had found someone who could help her. It was hard to tell. She reached out and took Kami’s hand in earnest, gripping so hard that his bones popped and Mr. Popo tried to reach in and pry her off of him.

“Mr. Popo, please,” Kami said, using his free hand to urge the caretaker away. He then placed it on Chi-Chi’s shoulder.

“Kami?” Chi-Chi asked with a sniff.

Kami bowed his head. “I’m so sorry, Chi-Chi, but I’m afraid I cannot tell you where Piccolo has taken your son.”

“Oh, Kami…” sighed Mr. Popo from somewhere behind Chi-Chi.

Chi-Chi grit her teeth and tightened her hold on Kami’s hand, twisting just slightly. Kami seethed and cringed at the pain.

Her next words came out with the grace of bricks being forced through a mail slot, and barely audible over the sound of countless tiny bones snapping in Kami’s hand.

“And - just - why - is - that?”

* * *

 

Piccolo’s brow quirked as his right hand tingled as though numb. His expression turned to a scowl as Kami tried to communicate with him telepathically.

This was a periodic thing Kami had been doing since the day Piccolo had been born. He was always prying and prodding, trying to figure out where he was and what he was up to. Piccolo hadn’t indulged him yet, his mind too well fortified for the big green bastard to force his way in, but it was incredibly annoying.

Still, the tingling was new.

Piccolo cast a glance down at the plateau where Gohan was trapped and snivelling. It didn’t please him to think so, but Piccolo had a feeling that the kid wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

The tingling got worse and spread up Piccolo’s wrist sharply, accompanied by Kami’s desperate attempt to get into his head.

It was more interesting than watching Gohan cry himself to sleep, that was for sure.

Piccolo sighed, and gave his other half a bit of space in his head. Just an inch. _What is it, Kami?_

It took Kami a moment to realize that Piccolo had well and truly let him in, and his response was immediate, and panicked: **_PICCOLO, HELP!_ **

* * *

 

“I - WILL - BREAK - YOUR - BONES - OLD - MAN!” Chi-Chi cried, twisting Kami to the elbow with such force and ferocity that he fell on one knee. “I don’t care if you have to take the damn bus to Piccolo - find him and tell me where he is so I can make him tell me what he’s done to my _baby boy!”_

Mr. Popo grabbed Chi-Chi by the waist and tried to pull her away from Kami, to no avail. She kicked out behind herself and landed a heel squarely in Mr. Popo’s stomach, knocking the wind out of him and landing him flat on his rump.

Kami, meanwhile, was doing everything in his power to convince Chi-Chi to let go of him. “Piccolo and I are connected telepathically but - _ow_ \- but he learned early on that he can shut me out if he - _eeEE_ \- if he focuses,” Kami stammered, his one free arm trying fruitlessly to break Chi-Chi’s iron grip. “I don’t - I don’t know where he is - _stop twisting!”_

“Get into his head, I don’t care how,” snarled Chi-Chi. “Then you’re going to tell me exactly where he-”

Kami’s eyes widened suddenly and he sputtered, “I’m in - he let me in!”

Chi-Chi released him and sent the Guardian of the Earth sprawling with a kick. She clapped her hands, suddenly as perky as a schoolgirl, and jumped in place. “Oh, wonderful!” she said. “Well, where is he? Where’s my Gohan?”

“One moment,” murmured Kami, nursing his broken hand and wrist.

 _Took you long enough,_ he thought.

 **_You better start explaining before I get bored of this, you old shoe,_ ** Piccolo said dryly from thousands of miles away.

 _I won’t keep you long, Piccolo - I’m content that your purpose with the boy is not immediately malicious,_ Kami replied. He took a moment to heal the damage Chi-Chi had done, then flexed his reconstructed fingers experimentally. _However, it would seem little Gohan’s mother isn’t._

**_Is that so?_ **

_Indeed. She’s here now, on the Lookout, and is prepared to do anything and fight anyone to get answers. I don’t know what to tell her. If she gets her son back, she would never permit him to train…_

**_And we’ll need his help to fight the Saiyans. Dammit._ **

_Indeed._

**_Well, what are you waiting for? Tell her she can’t have her kid back until after we deal with the Saiyans. You’re the Guardian of Earth, she should listen to you._ **

Kami eyed Chi-Chi apprehensively, his old bones still aching even after he’d regenerated them. She watched him like a predator watches prey, awaiting news of her boy’s whereabouts with bated breath.

_I don’t think that will suffice._

**_Then just kick her off the Lookout and be done with it!_ **

_But she - please, Piccolo. Help me out here._

There was silence on Piccolo’s end for a while, and for a moment Kami feared he’d been shut out again, left to deal with Chi-Chi all on his own. Thankfully, Piccolo replied before Kami could start to panic again.

 **_Alright, how’s this: you send her over to me and_ ** **I’ll** **_deal with her. Seeing as how you’re so incompetent and all._ **

Kami was confused. _You’ll talk to her? Why? What are you planning, Piccolo?_

**_Not a damn thing, I’m just far more persuasive than you._ **

Still apprehensive, Kami agreed. _But you mustn’t let her end Gohan’s training. We need as many allies as we can get._

Kami frowned and nodded as Piccolo relayed his location to him, and - steeling his nerves - he turned once more to face Chi-Chi.

“Piccolo is with Gohan in the wastelands far, far northeast of the Oval Sea,” said Kami. He rose to his full height and met Chi-Chi’s eyes. “He wishes to train Gohan to better combat the imminent Saiyan menace. I believe your son is in good hands, but if you truly wish to confront Piccolo… Well, now you know where to go.”

Chi-Chi shrieked and clapped her hands, and Kami found himself being pulled into a rib-crushing hug. “You’re the best, Kami! Goku was right, you really the wisest, kindest, best Guardian of the Earth anyone could ask for,” Chi-Chi said. She released Kami abruptly and he stumbled, only keeping his balance thanks to the support provided by his staff.

Just as quick, Chi-Chi was running for the edge of the Lookout. In one swift motion, she drew a capsule from inside her shirt and tossed it on the ground, releasing the car stored inside. She hopped in and fired up the engines, and the pressure generated beneath the vehicle flattened the flowers in the bed beneath it.

“My azaleas!” gasped Mr. Popo.

“Wait, Chi-Chi!” cried Kami. “I need you to relay a message to your friends about reviving Goku - they have to wait until a year has passed so that he has time to train with King-”

“Don’t you have a phone? Tell ‘em yourself, I have more important things to do,” Chi-Chi said, before slamming on the accelerator and sending her car flying off of the Lookout.

Kami and Mr. Popo shared a look, unsure of what to make of Chi-Chi.

“Hey, why didn’t you help me while she was twisting my arm off?” asked Kami after she had been gone for a good few minutes.

He was certain he saw Mr. Popo blush.


	3. Dinosaur Lament

Rain splattered against Chi-Chi’s face, and she managed to make it under a rocky overhang just in time to avoid the worst of the downpour. She ground her teeth together, cursing under her breath as she kicked a boot off to rub her aching feet.

Four days ago, she’d run out of gas and had been forced to capsule up the car and continue on foot. Luckily, she was used to travelling without a car due to Goku’s continued insistence that they didn’t need one (“The town is only fifteen miles away, we can get there on the Nimbus in just a few minutes!” Nevermind that the Nimbus never listened to her, and Goku never helped her with the shopping anyway…), but that didn’t mean the miles didn’t take their toll. She had blisters up and down her feet and her bones ached clear up to her knees.

‘Far, far to the northeast of the Oval Sea’ - well, she’d been going northeast from the Oval Sea, and Chi-Chi dared say she’d gone pretty far. She was starting to wonder if Kami or Piccolo had made up the directions just to get rid of her. The thought was infuriating and she punched the ground so hard the rocky terrain cracked under her fist.

“Those bastards, I’ll teach them to try and keep Son Chi-Chi from her baby boy,” she swore.

A scuffle sounded somewhere behind her, almost inaudible over the sound of the rain, and Chi-Chi jumped to her feet. She drew one of her swords from the scabbard, poised to slash.

A moment passed where the only sound was the downpour, and a the low rumble of thunder in the distance. Chi-Chi only just began to consider that the rain had simply knocked a branch out of a tree when that theory was invalidated by a fifteen-foot dinosaur stomping out from the treeline with saliva flying from its gaping mouth.

Chi-Chi let out a shriek despite herself, stumbling backwards as the dinosaur charged in her direction. It was bigger than anything that had chased her on her grocery trips, and far hungrier too, by the looks of things.

She got her bearings just in time, dodging to the side as it moved to snatch her up in its mouth. All it got instead was a mouthful of mud.

Chi-Chi raised her sword again, gritting her teeth, and ran at the dinosaur as fast as she could. It was by no means a slow beast, but it was also just that - a lumbering, stupid animal with glaring weaknesses. And she was Chi-Chi, Princess of Fire Mountain, and a warrior trained in the coveted turtle style - albeit an abridged version, courtesy of her father.

A roar escaped her as she darted around the back of the dinosaur, staying just out of reach of its long tail. It spun around to follow her, letting out a primal screech of its own as it lunged once more.

A mere moment before its jaws closed around her, Chi-Chi changed directions and ran directly at it. The beast’s mouth clamped down over empty air, but it had no time to be distraught before Chi-Chi sunk her blade deep into its belly.

The dinosaur cried out again, this time in pain, and Chi-Chi pushed the sword further up into its gut. With one swift motion, she withdrew the blade and sliced the beast up through its stomach.

Chi-Chi hopped out of the way as the dinosaur fell, and she allowed herself a moment of self-congratulation. It had been a while since she’d done any fighting beside the usual sparring Goku insisted upon whenever he got to choose their date-night activity, and even longer still since she’d killed anything.

_ It looks like I still got it, though, _ Chi-Chi thought smugly. Besides the hiccup of being directly under the beast when she’d gutted it, managing to douse herself in blood, it had been a flawless victory.

She was just getting ready to put the carcass in a capsule to keep for food when she heard it - over the sound of rolling thunder, not one or two, but dozens of shrieking dinosaurs. The cries were soon accompanied by the rumble of a stampede, and with a sinking feeling in her gut, Chi-Chi realized it was getting louder.

Thirty-odd dinosaurs burst forth from the treeline roaring in bloodlust.

Chi-Chi screamed, and took off as fast as she could.

* * *

 

Piccolo watched the display from high in the air, idly wondering if he should intervene. He didn’t have any love for Goku’s wife, but he didn’t exactly want to watch her torn limb from limb by wild dinosaurs. He ultimately decided against it. For one thing, the only reason he’d told Kami where he was in the first place was because he figured Chi-Chi wouldn’t actually be able to make it there. And for another, she seemed to be handling herself fairly well.

Which he hadn’t planned for, admittedly, but Piccolo had to admit that she wasn’t an incompetent fighter. After the initial shock of being confronted with three dozen dinosaurs, she’d drawn her second sword and gotten right to business, slashing, stabbing, and dodging beasts left and right. Piccolo squinted down at the battlefield, trying to follow the action - which was difficult, as it seemed Chi-Chi had mastered the after-image technique sometime after the World Martial Arts Tournament.

Piccolo rolled his eyes as he thought of Gohan, trapped atop a plateau with no idea what to do. How was it that he could be the son of two accomplished warriors like Goku and Chi-Chi and still not be able to figure out basic survival?

_ Come to think of it, I should go check on him, _ Piccolo decided. He cast one last glance down at Chi-Chi, just in time to see her make her way atop a dinosaur and plunge her sword through its skull.  _ She seems like she has everything handled here. _

With that, Piccolo turned and flew north, towards the wastelands where he’d dropped Gohan. He realized it was entirely possible Chi-Chi would actually make it there, instead of giving up or getting killed like he’d anticipated. He briefly considered switching locations so that Chi-Chi couldn’t steal Gohan back, but immediately banished the thought. Piccolo was by no means a hero, nor particularly sentimental, but he wasn’t without honor.

If Chi-Chi could make it to the wastelands in question, she would have more than earned the right to see her son again.

Besides, it didn’t matter how many dinosaurs she slaughtered - she wasn’t strong enough to go up against Piccolo. And she still had a long way to go.

* * *

 

The rain soon ceased, as did the onslaught of dinosaurs, and Chi-Chi found her way to a swollen stream to wash herself and her clothes in.

Once in the water and stripped to her skin, Chi-Chi assessed the damage she’d sustained in her fight. There were jagged claw-marks across one leg, from her thigh to her hip, and a puncture wound over her right shoulder that she knew would ache terribly once the adrenaline wore off. Besides that, she was covered in bruises and smaller scrapes, and had a shallow headwound that she could tell looked worse than it actually was. Her father had always been sure not to cut or bruise her when they’d trained together, but Goku had done her no such favors when they sparred. These wounds were far worse than anything Goku had ever done to her, but Chi-Chi supposed she should be grateful they weren’t more serious.

“Oh, Goku,” Chi-Chi sighed wistfully as she beat her dress against a rock, watching the water run red after it. She could practically hear him praising her, showering her with compliments and adoration and begging her to fight him again, but with swords, and no holding anything back this time. “You big lunkhead…”

She had to remind herself that he wasn’t gone forever, and distracted herself from the creeping sense of loneliness by fishing the capsule with her first-aid kit out of her bag, and subsequently seeing to her wounds.

By the time her wounds were dressed and her camp for the night was set up, the moon hung high overhead, framed by twinkling stars and the odd cloud. Chi-Chi took a moment to admire the scene, and it suddenly hit her that the sight of the full moon - with all the stars and breathtaking blue cast - was one she had never really shared with her son. She’d always enforced a strict bedtime so that he could grow up strong and develop a sharp mind, and as such, in his four years of life, the boy had never had time for stargazing.

_ When this is over, _ vowed Chi-Chi,  _ Gohan and I are going to lay down outside the house and watch the night sky. It could be educational! _

Chi-Chi fixed the image in her mind and used it to fuel the fire in her belly.

She laid under her makeshift tent (she’d brought a real one, but it had blown away in a windstorm two nights ago) with a sword clutched to her chest. She watched the moon for what felt like hours, and slowly drifted off to sleep.

* * *

 

Piccolo, meanwhile, was frantically trying to deal with the sudden appearance of a giant, earth-crushing ape.


	4. Hexagon Style

Hexagon Village was a fairly obscure settlement, almost completely outside the public eye except for a small soap company whose products were coveted as far as West City. Bulma would send boxes full of those soaps every year for Chi-Chi and Goku’s anniversary, always with a note remarking how important it was that Chi-Chi remind her husband to bathe. “He’s basically a wild animal,” was a phrase that always made it into Bulma’s letter.

Chi-Chi hadn’t even made the connection that the Hexagon Village was by the Oval Sea until she stumbled upon a roadway with signs pointing in its direction. She could have wept, thinking of having a warm bath and a meal made out of anything other than tough, unseasoned dinosaur meat. She’d been travelling for over a week and a half, and was starting to lose her mind from the lack of civilization.

In any case, she stumbled into the Hexagon Village and immediately began looking around for an inn.

“Uh, lady - you okay?” asked an older man, peering at Chi-Chi from the doorway of a hardware store. “You look… feral.”

Chi-Chi tried to give him her most civilized smile. “I’ve just been on the road for a while, that’s all. Say, could you point me to the nearest inn?” she asked.

The man scratched his chin, considering. “We don’t get many visitors here in Hexagon. Can’t say for sure we have one…”

“Please, you’ve got to have a spare room somewhere in this town,” Chi-Chi said, more intensely than she’d meant if the man’s expression was anything to go by. She cleared her throat and smoothed her worn skirt, trying to remember her girlhood lessons on manners and self-presentation. “I just need a place to stay for the night, where I can take a nice hot bath and a proper meal. Are you sure you don’t know of anywhere?”

The man seemed to think harder this time. “Er, maybe… The Scrubbs have got the biggest house in town. They might have a room to spare, but…”

Chi-Chi clapped, a sound so abrupt and joyous that the man practically leapt out of his skin. “Great! Can you get me some directions?” she asked.

“I - I was going to say that they might not agree to let you board, seeing as how they’re such private folks and all,” stammered the man.

“Nonsense! Leave that to me, I just need to know how to get there,” Chi-Chi insisted.

Reluctantly, the man explained how to get to the Scrubbs residence, and gave her one last piece of advice before sending her on her way: “Keep an eye out for their son, Giene. He fancies himself a fighter and might not take kindly to a houseguest.”

 _Noted,_ thought Chi-Chi as she started back down the road the man had directed her to. She didn’t think having to fight anyone would be a problem, if it came to it, but it was a different story entirely if Bub and Aqua Scrubb took their son’s wishes seriously, and he decided Chi-Chi was unwelcome.

Soon, she reached what could only be the Scrubb residence - a large home comprised of a main hall and several bubble-like extensions, surrounded by a metal fence coated in ivy. A plaque beside the gate deemed it the “Scrubb Hub - Home of the World-Famous Scrubb Soaps & Fragrances”.

Chi-Chi followed the path up to the front door, where she rapped the brass knocker twice and waited politely for an answer.

She was just preparing to knock again when someone cleared their throat behind her.

Chi-Chi turned around and saw a rather short, but muscular, young man with dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. He wore a bright red gi and a black sash at the waist, and over it all a studded leather jacket. He couldn’t have been older than sixteen, and seemed to be trying his best to look down on Chi-Chi - even though she was taller, and easily older than him.

 _This must be Giene Scrubb,_ Chi-Chi thought.

Deciding to make a good impression, she instantly put on her best smile and gave a short, respectful bow. “Good morning! Are you part of the Scrubb family, perchance?”

Giene turned his nose up at her slightly, and said, “I am - what’s it to ya, broad?”

 _If he were my child I would-_ “I’m a traveller, and was told that I might find a place to stay here. Would you happen to be the head of this household?” Chi-Chi knew for a fact he wasn’t, but her question made the boy glow, and she knew it was just the right thing to say.

“Afraid not, lady. Name’s Giene - my mom owns the place, and the company. Tell you what? Why don’t I introduce you two. You can talk about old lady stuff or whatever,” Giene said, feigning a dismissive shrug - but Chi-Chi could tell that he was just abuzz with excitement. “She’s around back, in the garden. Sniffing plants for soap stuff or whatever. C’mon.”

_Why does everyone call me “old lady”? I’m twenty-four…_

“Say, you’re clothes are interesting. Are you a fighter?” Chi-Chi asked, deciding it was a good idea to keep Giene in a good mood.

Not looking back while guiding her around the property, Giene laughed. “I guess you could say that. Self-taught, mostly. I’m pretty much the strongest guy around, you could say,” he rambled. Giene started babbling about his training regimen and diet and all the fights he’d been in, and Chi-Chi only listened well enough to know when to nod or gasp or say what hard work it must be. By the time they reached Aqua Scrubb’s scent garden at the back of the house, Chi-Chi could only think of how much she’d give to see Goku sock Giene in the teeth.

“Hey, Mom!” shouted Giene at the portly woman across the garden. “Visitor!”

Aqua came bumbling over, wiping her hands clean of dirt on her floral apron. She had a round, kind face, and the same jet-black hair as her son - also drawn into a ponytail.

“My goodness, how what a surprise - good lord, girl, what happened to you?” blurted Aqua. She fixed a pair of spectacles onto her face, squinting at Chi-Chi as if the dirt, grime, and bloodstains were some kind of optical illusion she had to decipher.

“I apologize for my appearance - I’m a traveller, and have been on the road for days now without a capsule house or even a proper tent,” Chi-Chi started to explain for what felt like the millionth time, though it was only really the first.

Giene suddenly cut in. “She wants to stay the night, some old guy told her we have rooms.” Giene snorted. “Figures the first traveller in forever would wind up here. This dumb hick town doesn’t even have a hotel…”

Aqua pursed her lips and quirked an eyebrow at her son.

“I’m not sure, we’ve never welcomed a stranger into our home before - no offense, Miss…?” started Aqua.

“Oh, I’m sorry - I never introduced myself,” gasped Chi-Chi, genuinely startled by her own lack of manners. Ten years of courtesy lessons, and she forgot to tell them her _name._ Beaming, and bowing again for good measure, she said, “My name is Son Chi-Chi, I’m from-”

A few paces away, Giene made a noise between a gasp and a cry, which came out as a strangled choking sound. Both Chi-Chi and Aqua jumped, equally bewildered by Giene’s sudden lack of composure. Red in the face and struggling for breath after his impromptu coughing fit, Giene managed to say, “ _You’re Son Chi-Chi? The Son Chi-Chi?”_

“Giene, you know of her?” asked Aqua.

“Do I know of her? How could I not?” Giene said as if his mother was out of her mind. “She was one of the quarter-finalists at the 23rd World Martial Arts Tournament - her fight with Son Goku went down in the books as the first match to ever end with a _marriage proposal,_ which is the most - er-” Giene blushed, and pressed on, “- a-anyway, she’s a _fighter,_ Mom. The real deal.”

Chi-Chi had to marvel at Giene’s abrupt change of attitude. For the first time, he looked and sounded exactly like what he was - a kid with a passion for martial arts that his mom couldn’t quite grasp.

“That’s nice, Giene, but I still don’t know about letting her stay…” Aqua began, rubbing her chin as she considered and inadvertently smudging her face with soil.

Giene took his mother by the arm and led her away a few paces, furiously whispering something Chi-Chi couldn’t hope to hear. She watched Aqua’s face switch between exasperation, to impatience, to consideration, and finally to grudging acceptance.

Positively glowing, Giene returned to Chi-Chi with an ear-to-ear grin. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you want, Chi-Chi!” he proclaimed.

Chi-Chi had to admit, she was somewhat taken aback by the verdict. “Really? I wouldn’t want to impose, if you’re uncomfortable with me staying,” she said.

“No, please stay! We’d love to have you - you must have so many cool stories about adventures you’ve been on, and people you’ve met, and different battles and cool moves and-” Giene was silenced as Aqua put a hand on his shoulder. Blushing, he excused himself and started back off the way he’d come, leaving Chi-Chi behind.

Aqua chuckled once he was out of earshot. “It’s rare to see him so excited about anything,” Aqua said. “If it wouldn’t be too much trouble, Mrs. Son, could you show him a few moves or techniques or whatever you call them? It would positively make his day. He’s so thrilled about that fighting stuff.”

Chi-Chi could hardly believe her luck. “I’d be happy to, Mrs. Scrubb - it’s no problem at all,” Chi-Chi insisted.

Aqua laughed, her cheeks turning rosy with her smile. “That’s wonderful - now let’s get you cleaned up, shall we?”

* * *

 

Staying with the Scrubbs was a welcome reprieve from cold nights on the hard ground, waking every few minutes in case the sound of a snapping twig or rustling bush meant the approach of a predator. They had an ample supply of fragrant soaps, shampoos, bath-bombs, and body-washes - which Chi-Chi took advantage of to the fullest. She came out of the bath smelling like a rose garden. Aqua found some clothes for Chi-Chi to borrow while her own garments were washed properly (with Scrubb Soaps & Fragrances brand detergent, of course) and hung up to dry. She wound up sitting down with Bub Scrubb for lunch, and Chi-Chi considered him a perfect gentleman - if incredibly boisterous.

Dinner was had with the whole family, and Giene could finally contain his excitement no longer.

“So, Chi-Chi, you really married Son Goku after the tournament?” he asked.

Chi-Chi chewed and swallowed her food before answering. “Of course - he was my dream boy since I was a little girl, and no one in their right mind would turn down someone so handsome when he’s practically begging for your hand,” she said with a grin. She caught the look in Giene’s eye, and realized he was hoping for more of a story. Knowing he was practically the only reason she’d been granted a room for the night, Chi-Chi went on, “Though, I suppose to say we got married _right_ after the tournament isn’t quite true. You see, my father and I agreed that I _had_ to get married in my mother’s dress, but the day of our wedding, a fire erupted around my father’s castle on Fire Mountain…”

The story of her and Goku’s days-long quest to save the Ox King and the wedding dress from the fire lasted all the way through dinner, and well into afternoon coffee. Giene hung onto every word and detail, perfectly enthralled.

“I’m sorry to say I haven’t got many stories besides that one,” Chi-Chi explained after she’d finished, sipping her second cup of coffee. “Shortly after we married, I became pregnant with my son, Gohan, and Goku and I decided to take things easy. These last few days have been the most adventure I’ve had in years, and it hasn’t exactly suited my tastes, to be honest.”

“Speaking of, dear,” started Bub, “what brings you all the way out to Hexagon? We’re not exactly easy to wind up at, if you know what I mean.”

Chi-Chi didn’t even pretend to consider giving them the full story of her business there. “I’m just on my way to the wastelands further north of here,” she said evenly. “It’s a… training thing.”

Aqua and Bub nodded knowingly, although Chi-Chi had a feeling that they barely understood a word of what she’d said - which was fine - but she caught Giene squinting at her.

 _This kid might be more trouble than he’s worth,_ Chi-Chi thought. She didn’t exactly want to regale him with tales of her husband’s death and son’s abduction just for his amusement.

Luckily, he didn’t push it, and before long Chi-Chi was comfortably cocooned in blankets and duvets in one of the Scrubbs’ spare rooms. She slept through the night for the first time in over a week, and woke with the sun and the sound of birds chirping.

Breakfast with Aqua and Bub was pleasant enough - Chi-Chi told the two all about how her son was going to be a physicist, and Aqua bemoaned her own son’s lack of interest in the company, and Bub began telling jokes about dairy farming - but it came to an end when Giene stopped by the table to speak to Chi-Chi.

“I was wondering if you and I could have a fight today,” he said, trying to come off as easy-going, but his fidgeting betrayed him.

Bub gasped. “Giene, that’s not any way to talk to a lady-” He was cut off by Aqua stomping his foot under the table, which somehow their son missed completely.

“I’d be happy to,” Chi-Chi agreed, remembering her promise to Aqua to show Giene a few techniques. A fight was just the same, wasn’t it? Her debt to the Scrubbs would be paid and she would be on her way later that day.

Giene couldn’t contain his glee. “Great! Meet me outside in an hour - I’m gonna do some warm-ups!”

“Thank you for this, Chi-Chi,” said Aqua once Giene was out of earshot. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen him this excited about anything.”

“He’s been trying to look cool for years, and you know cool people - they never smile,” Bub added. “I love him, but that boy’s gotten just a bit too big for his britches since learning those little tricks of his…”

Aqua nodded in agreement. “But this will be good for him. Maybe a fight with Chi-Chi here will be just what he needs to work off all of his extra energy so he can focus on more important things,” she said.

Chi-Chi chuckled with them, and enjoyed the rest of her breakfast with Aqua and Bub. As the end of the hour drew closer, she excused herself to her borrowed room, where she changed back into her own, freshly-washed clothes and packed her things up into a capsule. She then went outside to meet Giene for their fight.

She found him beyond the scent garden, standing with his back to the house in the middle of a grassy field.

“Hey, Giene!” she called as she approached.

He glanced at her over his shoulder - trying to come off as casual, she was sure - and waved lazily in her direction.

“Are you ready to begin?” Giene asked once Chi-Chi was close enough, not wasting any time.

Chi-Chi bristled. “Not so quick, we have to go over the rules, first,” she said.

That got Giene’s attention. He turned around, confused, and said, “Rules?”

“Yes, Giene. Rules,” Chi-Chi said. “You know, win conditions? Disqualifiers? Are we going to have a time limit, or multiple rounds, or any of that?” She and Goku always used the general rule that whoever was forced outside of a certain perimeter would be the loser, but that didn’t mean those rules would work for Giene.

Giene was somewhat flustered. “Oh yeah, win conditions, um-” After a brief moment of panicked consideration, he went on, “First blood. Whoever gets a scrape or a cut or something first is the loser.”

Chi-Chi shrugged. “Sounds good to me. Just don’t go crying to your mother once I make you bleed, got it?” she said.

Giene looked startled, and Chi-Chi realized it was the most frank she’d been with him since they’d met. She couldn’t help but smirk: he’d let the sweet, mild-mannered housewife bit fool him. Even if Giene didn’t learn any new techniques from their battle, he’d certainly learn to better assess his opponents. He’d said so himself - Chi-Chi had been a quarter-finalist at the World Martial Arts Tournament. She hadn’t gotten there by being pleasant.

“Just say the word when you’re ready to begin,” Chi-Chi said, walking around the meadow and taking her stance several paces away from Giene.

Having regained his composure, Giene assumed his own formation: a mockery of the stance learned in the turtle school, likely copied from inaccurate illustrations and grainy footage of the World Martial Arts Tournament. Chi-Chi smiled slyly. This would be a humbling experience for Giene, that much was certain.

“Ready?” he called from across the clearing.

“Born ready,” Chi-Chi replied.

Giene charged at her across the clearing, letting out a battle cry on the way. He reached Chi-Chi in moments, aiming three rapid-fire punches at her head, chest, and ribs - all of which Chi-Chi could see coming a mile away, and dodged easily.

Chi-Chi dropped low to the ground and kicked out, her shin colliding with Giene’s ankles and knocking him off balance. She used the momentum to hop to his side, and landed another kick against his back.

Giene stumbled forward, nearly falling over. He whirled around, eyes wide and grin wider.

“That was so fast - you dodged each of my punches like they were nothing,” he marveled.

Chi-Chi smiled sweetly. “They were.”

Giene’s grin slipped a bit, replaced by a look of determination. “Alright, let’s go again.”

Giene rushed her again, this time raising his leg as if to knee her in the stomach. Chi-Chi fixed his form with a glare, and like she suspected, there was no impact. Giene’s visage shuddered before her eyes before dissipating entirely - the after-image technique.

She felt the air shift to her left and Chi-Chi stepped back just in time for Giene’s fist to fly by her face. She brought her knee up in a quick, jerking motion, landing it in Giene’s abdomen and knocking the wind out of him.

He collapsed, clutching his stomach and wheezing.

“You’re sloppy,” Chi-Chi remarked. “You can’t use the after-image technique against any warrior worth their weight in salt and only use one layer. You have to fake them out at least twice to land a hit.”

From his spot on the ground, Giene chuckled. “Honestly, I’m not good enough at that technique to plant more than one image of myself,” he admitted. “I do have a few other tricks up my sleeve, though.”

Chi-Chi crossed her arms, still smirking. “Well, let’s see them, shall we? I’ve got a lot of ground to cover today, get to it,” she said.

Giene grinned and picked himself up. He took a few steps back and resumed his stance, crossing his forearms over his head and chest and breathing deeply.

The hairs on the back of Chi-Chi’s neck stood on end as a strange energy began to permeate the air, accompanied by a low growl from Giene.

 _Is he preparing to use an energy attack?_ Chi-Chi realized at just the right time. Giene let out a loud, furious cry as he thrust his palms out towards Chi-Chi. A wide blast of energy shot out, and Chi-Chi only stayed upright from digging her heels into the dirt and bracing herself.

She barely had time to fully register what had happened when Giene landed a wild kick to her abdomen.

Chi-Chi let out a cry - more of surprise than of pain - as she was sent flying backwards from the impact. She got her bearings at the last minute, spinning around in the air so that she landed on all fours with her eyes fixed on her opponent. Giene didn’t give her a moment of rest, though, and was throwing hit after bone-cracking hit at Chi-Chi in the blink of an eye. She stayed low to the ground, dodging backwards and baring her teeth like an animal as Giene’s blows met only with dirt and wheatgrass.

His form was sloppy, and his strength was nothing Chi-Chi couldn’t handle, but he fought with a ferocity that was difficult to combat - and besides that, he could control his ki well enough to fight with it, a feat even Chi-Chi had never learned.

Finally, Chi-Chi spotted an opening and tried an upward punch at his ribs. Giene switched moves at the last minute and caught Chi-Chi by the arm as soon as her fist impacted.

If he was winded, he didn’t show it, and instead moved to spin her around and use the resulting momentum to send her flying through the air. Chi-Chi grit her teeth, refusing to let it happen. As Giene yanked her off of the ground, Chi-Chi kicked out and landed both feet squarely in his face, and pushed with all her might.

“What the-” grunted Giene from under Chi-Chi’s boots.

“You asked for this, kid,” Chi-Chi said, before lifting one foot and bringing it back down as hard as she could.

Giene made a noise and lost his grip on Chi-Chi, and she landed on her feet. Giene, meanwhile, clutched his face with both hands.

“Blood?” asked Chi-Chi, not relaxing her stance.

Giene removed his hands from his face, revealing the bright-red boot print that stretched from his temple to his jaw. “You wish,” he spat. He’d turned his head at just the right moment to avoid breaking his nose or losing any teeth.

“Soon, you will too,” remarked Chi-Chi.

This time, she took the offensive. She charged at Giene at top speed, running in a circle around him, focusing as she altered her pace periodically. The look of utter shock on his face told her that her trick at worked - Giene was seeing ten Chi-Chi’s from his perspective, the after-image technique done right.

“ _What’s the matter, kid? You look confused,”_ jeered Chi-Chi, delighting in the mixed expression of panic and frustration.

Giene’s face quickly turned to rage, and he puffed his chest out and threw his head back and screamed - but it was no mere temper tantrum. The ground shook and the air vibrated with energy as Giene mustered up all of his power for another attack.

 _I have to make my move now!_ Chi-Chi lunged at Giene, her hand poised so that her nails would cut him on the shoulder, drawing blood and ending the fight. But before she could even reach him, a blast of ki rippled off of his body and smacked into Chi-Chi, full force.

She cried out and was sent sprawling, landing gracelessly on her back.

Her vision was made fuzzy by the blast, which had singed the grass in a near-perfect circle with Giene at the center of it.

“How do you like that?” asked Giene. His voice was muffled and far-away sounding, and almost inaudible over the ringing in Chi-Chi’s ears. “It took me, like, three years to figure that out. But I haven’t lost a fight since, and there’s no way I’m losing this one either!”

Chi-Chi grunted as she picked herself up, unsteady but hardly ready to concede defeat. If nothing else, she figured this fight was a testament to Goku’s gentle nature - he’d only hit her with enough energy to knock her off of the platform, like being caught in a strong wind. Giene’s energy blasts were like being hit by a bus.

She studied Giene’s posture, trying to guess at how exhausted he was from his last two energy blasts. Even breathing, straight spine, wide grin - it looked as though he was perfectly fine. Chi-Chi didn’t know if she could hold out long enough to draw blood if his last two attacks had scarcely winded him. Chi-Chi cursed herself for not having Goku show her how to use her ki while she had the chance. If she’d known it would ever come in handy…

“That’s a neat trick,” Chi-Chi said. “How do you even learn to do that without a master to show you?”

Giene swelled with pride. “What can I say? I’m just really talented,” he said.

Chi-Chi laughed. “I’m serious,” she said, realizing that Giene might actually be dumb enough to fall for her ploy. “I mean, it’s not like you figure that sort of thing out by accident. Goku had to train for years with some of the most powerful fighters in the world to learn to do it, and even he gets tired if he uses too much energy like that.”

The look on Giene’s face told her it was exactly the right button to push.

“Honestly, I picked it up by watching old videos of the World Martial Arts Tournament,” admitted Giene. “It freaked Mom and Dad out when I first started practicing, but I’d train all day long and then climb on the roof and copy the stances the fighters would use and just think of nothing but the strength I had gained that day. I’d let it consume me, and I’d focus on it and nothing else, and one day I let it all out in one big scream and blew a hole in the roof over the upstairs bathroom. It was great!”

“Interesting,” murmured Chi-Chi, trying to unravel what Giene had told her to figure out if it was what she needed to know. Gathering of energy through contemplation, and then projecting it outward as a blast… It could take years of practice.

Or it could take five minutes. It all depended on whether or not Chi-Chi could pull it off.

“Anyway,” Giene said, realizing the fight had been derailed, “let’s get back to business. There’s still more stuff I wanna try out.”

Chi-Chi didn’t wait for Giene to make his attack, instead taking off at top speed and only slowing down long enough to plant an after-image millimeters behind him, making Giene scream and stumble before he realized what it was. He looked wildly around the meadow, searching for Chi-Chi, but she was too fast to follow.

“I’ll use another blast if I have to,” he bellowed, but Chi-Chi didn’t slow. “You asked for it!”

Giene resumed his stance and began gathering energy for another attack. Chi-Chi stopped immediately and took on a similar, if more stable, pose.

She tried to focus on her strength, her ki - the fire deep in her belly that flared up whenever she fought or argued or watched the night sky thinking of all that had been taken from her. She let it spread upwards from her gut, to her chest, limbs, fingers and toes.

Chi-Chi fixed Giene with a glare. He was roaring into the sky, his energy shaking the earth around him, preparing to send every loose object in a fifty-foot radius flying.

Chi-Chi slid her feet across the ground so that her left side faced Giene. She took a deep breath, raising both arms to the right, feeling her bones vibrate with energy that itched to be released.

With a swift motion, Chi-Chi whipped her arms around to her left, towards Giene - with them, a controlled blast of ki whipped out of her arms and rattled the earth as it rippled towards Giene.

Not a moment too soon, it smacked into Giene’s face and sent him flying - ten, twenty, thirty, fifty feet backwards. Chi-Chi gasped, fearing he’d land on the metal fence and stab himself, and she chased after him.

Luckily, Giene landed in the middle of Aqua’s scent garden, ruining a flowerbed but still in one piece. The sound of his impact rattled the windows of the house, and Aqua and Bub came running out, both white in the face and flustered.

“Giene!” gasped Aqua, seeing her son laying, semi-conscious in her garden.

“What happened?” asked Bub, his gaze shifting between his son and Chi-Chi as she hopped the fence and ran to help him up.

Chi-Chi hoisted Giene to his feet, grinning at the stream of red oozing down his face from his nose. “Look at that, Giene - it looks like I drew first blood,” Chi-Chi said.

Still looking unsure of what was going on, Giene grabbed clumsily at his face, alarmed by the sight of blood on his hand when he pulled it away. “Oh,” was all he said.

Aqua bristled. “Is no one going to explain to me what the hell is going on?” she demanded. “I thought you two were just having a friendly fight!”

Chi-Chi turned to Aqua, and bowed her head respectfully. “I have to apologize,” she said. “When you agreed to let me stay the night, I promised to show your son a new technique or two as a favor. But it looks as though he taught me something instead.”

“What?” asked Bub after a beat.

Chi-Chi laughed, a high, jingling sound that she only let loose before losing consciousness. Then, the exhaustion of using an energy attack for the first time ever caught up to her, and she promptly collapsed.

* * *

 

“Do you really have to leave so soon, Chi-Chi?” asked Giene, frowning as he walked Chi-Chi out of Hexagon Village.

Chi-Chi nodded solemnly. “I have to. Like I said, I have important things to do in the wasteland, and as much as I’ve enjoyed staying with your family, I can’t afford to waste anymore time,” she explained. It had taken two days to recover from her fight with Giene, but now she was finally ready to continue her quest to save her son.

Giene humphed, popping up the collar of his leather jacket in a transparent attempt to mask his disappointment. “Well, come back and see us again sometime, anyway,” he mumbled.

Chi-Chi laughed. _He really is a dorky kid, trying to look cool all of the time,_ she thought.

They reached the northern gate, and came to a stop.

“I hope you keep getting stronger, Giene,” said Chi-Chi. “And I also hope you find a master to whip you into shape. Your poise is absolutely atrocious. I’ve seen kindergarteners with better form than you.”

Giene chuckled, going red in the face just a bit. “Sure, and I hope you can learn to use ki without fainting. Doesn’t do you much good in a fight if you need a three-day nap right after, right?” he said.

“Right, I don’t intend to be a novice forever,” said Chi-Chi. She placed a hand on Giene’s shoulder, and said with earnest, “Take care of yourself. And quit calling your mother old - she doesn’t put up with your terrible teenage attitude just so that you can insult her for trying.”

Giene blushed openly, and cleared his throat. “Er, yeah. Sure. Goodbye, Chi-Chi,” he said. “And… I’m sorry about Goku, too.”

Chi-Chi’s blood ran cold. “What?” she said.

“I’m sorry - I kinda figured, since you were travelling alone, and you always referred to him in the past tense… and you also kinda got a look in your eye. I’m sorry,” blabbed Giene. “I don’t know what happened to him specifically, or where your kid fits into all of it, or why you need to go to the wastelands, but - well, good luck, basically. I hope it works out for you.”

Chi-Chi smiled, her heart warming up. “Thanks, Giene,” she said softly. Her hand slid off of his shoulder, and she started up the northward path.

Honestly, she wasn’t sure if she’d ever return to Hexagon Village to visit Giene or the other Scrubbs again - whether because the wastelands would kill her, or just pure, uncaring circumstance - but she knew she’d never forget her days there. Every time she fought henceforth, she’d have a reminder, after all.


	5. Stabbin' Kid and the Boys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i debated for a long time even including this chapter because 1) nothing relevant really happens and 2) there is no second reason that's it.
> 
> then i remembered the garlic jr. saga
> 
> so i don't feel bad posting this one bit

Piccolo felt the back of his neck prickle as he felt her energy.

She was getting closer, and stronger, too. He cast his gaze uneasily to the south, briefly considering relocating with Gohan once again. He dashed the thought. There was still a ways to go, and even if he could sense Chi-Chi’s energy even from such a distance, that didn’t mean she was stronger than him.

“Mr. Piccolo? Are you okay?”

Piccolo turned his attention back to the youth sitting across the fire from him, one eye swollen shut, covered head-to-toe in cuts, bruises, and scrapes, but nonetheless as chipper as a bird. “You look worried, I mean. Specifically in that direction. Is someone coming?” Gohan asked.

“Forget about it, kid,” snapped Piccolo.

Gohan frowned slightly at Piccolo’s tone. Piccolo sighed and relented despite himself. “Yes, someone is coming. But I doubt they’ll make it and they certainly won’t be able to beat me even if they do, so quit worrying about it,” Piccolo insisted.

Gohan grinned. “I’m not worried about it, Mr. Piccolo. I was just saying that _you_ looked worried about it, and if you wanted to talk through your feelings-”

“I am going to break both of your ankles,” Piccolo said firmly.

“I need those,” Gohan objected, but he dropped the subject.

Soon, Gohan curled up by the dying fire and fell fast asleep, as only children can, and Piccolo was left alone with his thoughts and the knowledge that Chi-Chi may very well be there to take Gohan back any day.

He cast his gaze down to the child snoring beside him, and felt a strange lurching sensation in his chest.

 _I don’t want to say goodbye to you,_ Piccolo realized, and his stomach bottomed out.

 _Because then I won’t be able to train you, and we’ll be unprepared for the Saiyan menace, and the entire Earth and everyone on it will be destroyed,_ Piccolo added mentally, if only so that he could rest comfortably with the knowledge that he hadn’t gone soft since taking on Gohan as his pupil.

* * *

 

Seven months.

Seven months since Goku’s death and Gohan’s abduction.

Seven months spent traversing the wastelands, slaughtering wild beasts to stay alive, and sleeping on rocks and under makeshift blankets of branches.

The only thing that kept Chi-Chi from phoning Bulma and tearfully begging for a ride home was her ability to sense energy that she’d developed since her journey began, which confirmed that Piccolo did seem to be where he claimed. Besides, travelling on foot had gotten quite a bit more manageable after she’d learned to use her ki. It had opened up possibilities Chi-Chi hadn’t even considered possible before, and she found herself mostly travelling by massive leaps and bounds from plateau to plateau. It came in handy, too, as she’d long since lost the capsule with the car in it, which made vehicular travel a no-go.

 _Note to self: you owe Dad a new car,_ Chi-Chi thought as she made a fifty-foot jump from one ridge to the next. _Maybe I’ll get him something sporty - no durable, he does weigh quite a bit…_

A scream derailed her train of thought and distracted Chi-Chi long enough that she messed up her touch-down and wound up landing flat on her face. The same scream sounded again, and when Chi-Chi listened, she realized it was accompanied by a series of cruel laughter and revving engines.

 _I guess I’m doing this now,_ she thought, dusting off her skirt before jumping down from the ridge into the canyon below.

A girl with cropped red hair was backed up against the canyon wall with six men on studded black-and-violet dirtbikes around her in a semicircle. The skinniest and shortest of the six - the leader if the decorations on his bike were any indication - leaned towards her with a sly grin that showed off crooked, yellowed teeth.

“What’s the matter, Baby?” he jeered at the red-haired girl. “What, Teenie over there gets handsy for two minutes, and suddenly you don’t wanna hang out with us no mo-”

His sentence turned into a scream as Chi-Chi dropped into the scene inches from his face. He recoiled instinctively, falling backwards off his bike. He pulled some lever or pushed some button on the way down, and the vehicle shot out from under him and zig-zagged around the rocky terrain before crashing into a boulder.

Chi-Chi started walking towards him, face dark and fists balled and ready for action. He kept scuttling back in the dirt, trying to stammer out some threat or jeer that would help him reclaim control of the situation.

“You feral bitch, where the hell did you come from?” he managed at length.

“Fire Mountain, though I’ve spent the last couple of years in the Paozu Region,” Chi-Chi said, a mockery of amicability. “What about you, though? I love your cadence, dear. What is that, a North City accent? It’s so quaint.”

The man picked himself up off the dirt, glaring at Chi-Chi over his sunglasses. “Quit your bullshittin’, mama,” he snapped. He drew a stiletto switchblade out of his jacket pocket, exposing the blade with a flick of his wrist so that it glinted menacingly in the sun. “Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys ain’t here to play games.”

Chi-Chi raised her eyebrows. “Did you say ‘Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys’?” she asked, incredulous.

The leader grinned, then spat in the dirt, twirling the knife around in his hand still. “S’right, sister. You just got yourself involved with the most notorious gang this side of the-”

“You call yourself _‘Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys’?”_ Chi-Chi demanded, her serious facade crumbling to reveal stark exasperation. “That’s the dumbest name for anything I’ve heard in my life. Who’s in charge? Who decides what your gang is called? _‘Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys’,_ you’ve got to be joking.”

The leader, who by the pink cast to his skin seemed to be Stabbin’ Kid himself and the one responsible for naming the Boys as well, grit his teeth and raised his knife to Chi-Chi menacingly. “What’s it matter to you, grandma? You’re gonna be dead in a sec anyway so-”

Stabbin’ Kid’s sentence was cut short by a fist in his gut, which landed so forcefully that he spat blood onto Chi-Chi’s shirt. Stabbin’ Kid was lifted off the ground on Chi-Chi’s uppercut, and he stayed balanced on her fist for a moment before she allowed him to slide off into the dirt. He’d lost his switchblade somewhere in the process, not that it mattered to Chi-Chi.

“The - fuck?” gasped Kid, clutching his abdomen.

“I swear to god, the next person to call me ‘grandma’ is going to be drop-kicked all the way to West City,” Chi-Chi said, flashing her eyes at the other five gangsters. They each recoiled under her gaze, too paralyzed to attack or run away or even talk shit at that point.

With no small amount of difficulty, Kid picked himself up off the ground and stumbled over to one of his lackies. “What are you waiting for, you fucking mouth-breather?” Kid demanded as he hopped onto the back of one of their dirtbikes. “Step on it!”

“You have two minutes to get out of my sight before I decide to get physical with you boys,” Chi-Chi said evenly, which was all the encouragement Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys needed.

They revved their engines and turned tail, speeding off the in the opposite direction and kicking up no small amount of dirt and dust in the process. By the time the air cleared, they were nowhere to be seen.

Chi-Chi was just turning to go when a pair of hands gripped her bicep.

 _Oh, right. I’d almost forgotten about her,_ Chi-Chi thought, looking down at the young red-haired woman at her side.

“Who are you?” she asked, her eyes wide with amazement.

“My name is Chi-Chi. I’ve been travelling through the wastelands for a while,” Chi-Chi said. “And you are?”

The girl blushed and stood back, clasping her hands behind her back so that she wouldn’t be tempted to grab at Chi-Chi again. “Me? My name’s Baby. Or at least, that’s what it’s been since I joined up with the Boys,” she said. She added in a much more somber tone, “I guess I can go back to usin’ my old name now. God, what am I gonna do?”

“Do you have anywhere to go?” asked Chi-Chi. “Or any way of getting there?”

Baby choked back a sob, averting her eyes. “No on both accounts,” she admitted. “I left camp on a bike, but Kid chased me into a ditch a couple miles back and the thing is trashed. I don’t know what I was thinking, it’s not like I’ve got anywhere to go. I just - I just had to get away from ‘em.”

Baby looked to be on the verge of hysterics, so Chi-Chi pulled her into a bone-crushing hug that helped to keep her grounded. “Tell me what happened. Maybe I can help,” Chi-Chi said.

_This is a distraction. I don’t have time for this. What if Piccolo is cooking Gohan over a low flame this very moment?_

While Baby struggled to regain her composure, Chi-Chi focused on the massive power level still a great distance to the north. Beside it, there was a smaller one - no doubt Gohan’s - that didn’t seem to be getting any weaker. It would be fine for a while, Chi-Chi decided.

“I joined Stabbin’ Kid because I thought it’d be a hoot,” Baby said into Chi-Chi’s shoulder. “You know, just me and some friends cruising the wastelands on bikes. It’s illegal, some of the stuff we do, but it ain’t like they were killers or anything. It sure as hell beat being out of a job at the time, anyway. All the guys were cool and all I had to do to pull my weight was fix up whatever they plopped down in front of me. But I guess, after a while, their demands got a bit too…” Chi-Chi felt Baby shudder in her arms, “... intimate.”

“Really?” Chi-Chi prompted, her voice dangerously soft.

Baby sniffed again, and Chi-Chi let her step back and rub her eyes with her palms. “Anyway, I told ‘em I wasn’t interested in that sort of thing. Guys couldn’t keep their hands or their comments to themselves up in Youthtown, either. That’s part of the reason why I left in the first place. They didn’t take it so well, said that they can get a mechanic anywhere and that if I wanted to stay I’d have to pull my weight different ways,” Baby said, her voice taking on a hateful edge. “I told ‘em to go get a new mechanic, then. But they wouldn’t let me leave. They chased me. God, I should of known better. What makes guys in the wasteland any better than guys at the goddamn hardware store?”

Baby spat into the dirt and sat down with her arms folded, her expression dark and her eyes red with stress and tears.

Chi-Chi turned in the direction that the rest of the gang had fled in, furrowing her brow as she focused on the cluster of ki in the distance, too weak and far away to be distinguishable but doubtlessly Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys.

“How far away is your camp?” asked Chi-Chi, running her thumb over the hilt of her sword.

Baby looked up. “N-not too far, I guess. Maybe a four or five hour drive if you head straight for it, no stopping,” Baby said. “Why?”

“We’re gonna race ‘em to it,” Chi-Chi said evenly.

* * *

 

The sun was starting to set as Kid and the Boys came upon the cluster of mismatched and modified capsule houses they called home. “God, finally,” sighed Kid as the camp appeared over the top of a ridge. Teenie, who Kid had been gripping onto for dear life since they ran from the crazy lady, maneuvered carefully around the terrain so as not to jostle Kid or the bike too badly. After all, they’d lost their best mechanic, and if the bike was busted, it was done for.

 _Bitch. Thinks she can just take off with no repercussions,_ thought Kid bitterly.

Five bikes pulled up to camp and were put away in their capsules one by one, before being handed off to Todd - the most responsible of the Boys - for safekeeping.

“What do we do now, boss?” asked Growner as the gang dispersed.

Making his way to the kitchen capsule for a snack, Kid shrugged. “Whatever - we’ll head into Youthtown tomorrow and hire a new mechanic. Maybe we’ll find a girl with a goddamn sense of adventure while we’re at it,” Kid said. “Then we’ll head back into the wasteland, and teach Baby a lesson she isn’t gonna forget.”

“Oh? And what lesson is that, exactly?”

Kid and Growner both jumped, looking around wildly for the source of the voice.

“Up here, genius.”

Kid looked up and his mouth fell open - in shock, in horror, or both, it was hard to tell - at the sight of the same feral bitch from before. Specifically, she was hovering thirty feet up in the air with her hands on her hips.

“She can fly?” gaped Growner from behind Kid.

Shock quickly turned into panic, and then to rage. “What are you waiting for, you baboon? Shoot her!” snapped Kid. “Boys! All of you, get out here!” Teenie, Todd, Mr. Middler, and Kid Sr. all came out of the respective capsule rooms, only Todd thinking to bring a weapon.

Dutifully, Todd took aim at the intruder and unloaded a magazine in her direction. However, before Kid’s very eyes, she vanished into thin air, and Todd’s bullets were wasted.

“What the-” started Kid, his words cut off by a sickening crunch behind him.

He whirled around in time to see Todd and Mr. Middler collapse into motionless heaps. The woman was nowhere to be seen.

Kid Sr. let out a groan of pain, and Kid spun to see him curl up into a ball, clutching his abdomen. Then Teenie let out a cry, but before Kid could even hope to assess that facet of the situation, Growner was snatched up before his eyes, disappearing completely along with his assailant.

Rage cooled back into panic, and Kid struggled to keep his balance and hold his bladder at the same time.

Suddenly, Growner reappeared and fell to a heap at Kid’s feet.

 _Well, I won’t have to worry about holding my bladder anymore,_ was Kid’s last coherent thought before _she_ appeared again right in front of him with, shoulders squared and fists up.

* * *

 

“This is one of Capsule Corp.’s newest models. I don’t think it’s even hit the market yet, but some guy we mugged a while back - I think he was famous for sports or whatever - he had it on him,” Baby said as she deftly punched buttons on the vehicle’s computer. “It’s entirely self-piloting. You just punch in coordinates and the computer takes care of the rest. It’s a got a million sensors and cameras on it - it can travel any terrain and navigate any situation. Plus, I’ve modified it so it doesn’t have a set top speed.”

Baby turned her head to the back seat of the vehicle, where Stabbin’ Kid and the Boys were tied up, gagged, and plain terrified if they weren’t unconscious. “You guys will be at the Youthtown Police Station in no time flat,” she finished. She punched in one or two more things on the computer, before sliding out of the car and slamming the door.

Chi-Chi watched lights blink on the vehicle as it rose from the ground and oriented itself towards Youthtown. It took off at alarming speed, and Chi-Chi could have sworn she heard a shriek from inside the vehicle.

Baby laughed as the vehicle disappeared from sight, and turned to Chi-Chi. “I can’t thank you enough,” she said. “When they had me cornered in the wastelands there, I thought I was a goner. But you-”

Chi-Chi raised her hand. “It’s nothing, Baby,” Chi-Chi insisted. “I did what anyone with any honor would have done. I can’t stand men like them, and the fewer there are out and about, the better.”

Baby smiled and laughed. It was the first time Chi-Chi had seen her at ease, and it warmed her heart. “You do seem like the type of person who would say that,” Baby said, absently kicking rocks.

Chi-Chi agreed to stay the night with Baby in the capsule camp. After all, how could she turn down a real kitchen with a stove and electric lights and a spice rack (albeit one that didn’t seem to get much use)? Baby never asked for Chi-Chi to cook anything, but nevertheless she found herself in the kitchen capsule putting together a proper meal for the first time in months.

“You’re a good cook,” Baby said, genuinely in awe as she watched Chi-Chi work. “Damn. Didn’t think there was much demand for a professional chef out in the wastelands.”

Chi-Chi laughed. “Don’t be so silly. I just cook a lot at home - far more than the average person, too. My husband’s a bottomless pit and so is my little boy, with every growth spurt he hits. It’s a miracle we can even afford to feed them,” she said.

Baby didn’t respond for a minute. “Back up,” she said at length, earning a curious look from Chi-Chi. “You have a _house?_ You’re _married?_ With a _kid?”_

Chi-Chi frowned. “Yes. Why? Is that strange?” she asked.

Baby shook her head, hands on her hips. “No, it’s just - I kinda figured you must live out here. What with the sword and the pelts and all,” Baby said. “Plus with the fighting, I’d guessed you were some kind of nomad or folk hero or something. Throttling a gang of criminals didn’t exactly communicate ‘married woman’ to me.”

Despite herself, Chi-Chi laughed. “Well, these past few months have been a very challenging time for me. But hopefully, it’ll all be over soon, and I can go back home with my family and just have normalcy again,” Chi-Chi said. A timer pinged and she rushed to get something out of the oven. “Speaking of, Baby, what are your plans for the future?”

The sudden change of subject made Baby squirm. “Oh, me? I… I dunno,” she admitted. “I guess I could go to a new town, try to get another job as a mechanic. I wouldn’t know where to start, though. I could always stay out here and keep looting tourists, but I’m not so sure this life is for me…”

Chi-Chi hummed, reading the thermometer she’d stuck into the roast duck. “You could always try Capsule Corp., you know. West City’s the best place in the world to be a mechanic, thanks to them,” Chi-Chi said.

Behind her, Baby laughed bitterly. “Me? At Capsule Corp.? Yeah right. You kinda need connections to get a job there. Too many people try it,” Baby explained.

“Well, it’s a good thing you have connections then, isn’t it?” Chi-Chi commented. She frowned at the thermometer and decided the duck needed more time.

“What are you talking about?” asked Baby. “I don’t know anybody, let alone anyone worth their weight in salt at _the Capsule Corporation.”_

Chi-Chi smiled knowingly. “You may not, but I certainly do,” she said. Seeing the confused look on Baby’s face, Chi-Chi explained, “You see, my husband has been best friends with Bulma Briefs since they were children. He must have saved her life a hundred times, at least. Dr. Briefs sends us all kinds of books on physics and engineering for our son’s studies, and his wife and I trade quilts at least twice a year.” Chi-Chi winked. “I can put in a good word for you.”

Baby stared at her, gape-jawed. “Who _are_ you?” she asked, entirely floored.

* * *

 

They saw each other off the next morning.

“Here: I know  you can fly, but maybe you’d like to just put your feet up and let modern advancements in transportation carry you for a bit,” Baby said, placing a capsule in Chi-Chi’s open palm. “It’s an older model, but I souped it up a lot while I’ve been here. She’s kinda my baby, but I want you to have her.”

Chi-Chi held the capsule to her chest. “Thank you so much,” she said earnestly.

Baby shook her head. “No, thank you. You saved my life and gave me another chance,” Baby said, waving the scrap of paper with Chi-Chi’s information scribbled on it. “I never thought I’d even have a shot at working in West City, and at Capsule Corp. too. It’s amazing.”

They hugged each other tight, and Chi-Chi promised to catch up with her in West City soon. Baby hopped into her own vehicle, still waving to Chi-Chi even as she fired up the engines and took off over the horizon.

“Good luck!” Chi-Chi called as Baby gradually disappeared from sight.

Chi-Chi placed the capsule inside her shirt for safekeeping, then focused on Piccolo’s ki with her brow furrowed. Having found him, she turned on her heel and launched herself into the sky, covering over a hundred feet in a single bound.

 _No more distractions,_ she thought, landing with enough force to rattle rocks and taking off at top speed in the direction of Piccolo and Gohan’s ki.

They were so close, she could practically smell them. Nothing in the world could stop her now.


	6. Chi-Chi Arrives

Piccolo glanced up, not moving from his meditative position over the stream. He grimaced when he saw her, standing with her shoulders squared and her chest heaving from the exertion of running all the way there. Chi-Chi looked different. The most glaring change was all the bulk she’d put on over the past eight months, made obvious by torn sleeves which exposed her muscles. The second big difference was the array of pink and silver scars scattered across her skin, some deeper and more permanent than others, but each one representing a different challenge or opponent she’d overcome. Her hair, also, had grown considerably, tied back in a sloppy, wild knot atop her head.

But for all her physical differences, the look in Chi-Chi’s eyes was the same.

“You mean to take your son back,” Piccolo said.

“Where is he?” demanded Chi-Chi.

If she’d had expectations of fighting him for information, Piccolo gladly subverted them. He jerked his thumb behind him, to the northwest. “He’s asleep at our camp atop a plateau about ten miles in that direction,” said Piccolo. “And to answer your next question, no, I didn’t do anything unspeakable to him, and he’s perfectly alive and healthy. Maybe a little bruised, but that’s to be expected, given the intensity of our training.”

Chi-Chi regarded him skeptically, pacing in a semicircle around Piccolo with her hand never leaving the hilt of her sword.

Her next words didn’t surprise Piccolo one bit. “I’m taking him back.”

Piccolo sighed, and floated away from the stream and into a standing position a short distance from Chi-Chi. He assumed his usual stance, eyes fixed on his opponent. “I’m aware,” was all he said.

Chi-Chi’s brow lowered into a glare, and she drew her sword. “So be it, green man,” Chi-Chi spat, before leaping into battle.

* * *

 

Gohan jerked upright, awoken by a painful buzzing at the base of his spine, where it connected to his skull. His hair stood on end, and he looked around - frightened and confused - before realizing what it was, and where it was coming from.

He picked himself up and wandered to the edge of the plateau, around the embers of his and Piccolo’s fire. In the distance, he could have sworn he saw two figures doing battle. He could certainly feel it - their ki flared, flashed, and swelled with every move either of them made, so powerful and pungent that it rattled Gohan’s bones. Gohan could recognize Piccolo’s energy well enough, but the other one was new.

Gohan frowned, finding Piccolo’s opponent familiar somehow. Someone had been approaching for weeks now - maybe even months - and every now and then their ki grew distinct enough for Gohan to feel it in the distance. It felt like it was them that Piccolo was fighting. But there was something else…

Gohan settled into a sitting position, resting his head in his hands as he watched the tiny dots do battle miles away. Piccolo’s opponent didn’t seem evil, not like Raditz had, so he had to wonder why they were fighting in the first place.

The battle went on for a few more minutes, and the restlessness and curiosity finally got to Gohan.

“I gotta see this for myself,” he said, before hopping off the plateau towards the battle.

* * *

Their battle had reached something of a stalemate - though Piccolo had more brute strength and speed than Chi-Chi, he didn’t have quite the eye for exploitable openings and pattern recognition. He might have been quick enough to land a blow, and strong enough that it mattered, but Chi-Chi had a knack for turning his momentum against him.

They stood on opposite sides of the stream, each with heaving chests and blood oozing down their faces from their noses and mouths. Chi-Chi spat into the grass, her saliva thick with red, and Piccolo opted to just wipe his face with his wrist.

“You’re good,” he said grudgingly.

“Save it,” Chi-Chi snapped. “You’re the last person I want to hear it from.”

Her words brought with them a pang of guilt that took Piccolo utterly by surprise. The bitterness in her voice seemed to make something click in Piccolo’s mind, a realization that almost everything bad that had happened to Chi-Chi in her life was a direct consequence of his actions. He’d been aware of that consciously, of course, but it wasn’t until he stood face-to-face with Chi-Chi that he felt it in his bones.

Which irritated Piccolo to no end.  _Why should I care? Everything I did had to be done anyway,_ he told himself.

Piccolo’s contemplation left him vulnerable for a moment too long, and Chi-Chi capitalized on the opening.

She kicked off and hurtled through the air at Piccolo, swinging her sword wildly.

Piccolo was caught off guard, but still dodged each slash - except for a shallow cut across the cheek. When he raised his arms to counter-attack, Chi-Chi dropped low and thrust her palm out towards his stomach, letting loose a blast of energy that hit her adversary dead-on and sent him flying.

Piccolo smacked into a rock formation with enough force to crumble it, and was buried by the rubble.

Chi-Chi didn’t let her guard down, still able to feel his energy.

Sure enough, Piccolo exploded out of the rubble and shot straight upwards into the air. He touched down, still clutching his abdomen where Chi-Chi had hit him, breathing staggered.

“Again, you’re better than I anticipated,” Piccolo grunted. He gave a low chuckle. “Then again, I’ve got a feeling I might be a bit more than you bargained for as well.”

Chi-Chi took on a firmer stance, her eyes never wavering from Piccolo, and her focus never drifting from his energy. She’d seen him fight at the World Martial Arts Tournament, and knew for a fact that he had a million tricks up his sleeve. Everything from extending limbs, to doubles, to just growing a hundred times his usual size - nothing could be ruled out.

But all he did was shrug off his cloak and his turban, the garments falling to the ground and kicking up little clouds of dust on impact.

 _Weighted clothes,_ Chi-Chi realized.  _Great._

Before the fight could continue in earnest, though, Piccolo’s gaze snapped up towards the sky - looking first shocked, then furious. “What are you doing here? Go back to the camp!” barked Piccolo.

Chi-Chi followed his gaze and her heart stopped.

Floating fifty feet in the air, looking like a deer in headlights, was Gohan. Chi-Chi couldn’t move - she hadn’t even realized he was there, she was so focused on Piccolo.

“Gohan,” Chi-Chi breathed, and her sword slipped out of her hands. “Gohan!”

“Mom!” cried Gohan, floating down to the ground and running at Chi-Chi with his arms open and his grin wide.

Piccolo all but forgotten, Chi-Chi made a beeline for her son. She scooped him up in her arms and hugged him as tight as she could, a grip that would have shattered anyone else, but Gohan had grown much stronger since she’d seen him last and endured it with a laugh. He even managed to free his own arms so he could wrap them around Chi-Chi’s neck. “I missed you, Mom,” he said into her shoulder. “When’d you get so strong? I didn’t think anyone could stand up to Mr. Piccolo for so long.”

The mention of Piccolo brought Chi-Chi back to the present. Holding Gohan under her arm like a sack of flour, she turned and met Piccolo’s eyes. He was hanging back by the rubble pile, arms folded over his chest and expression neutral - well, maybe a bit peeved.

“I’m leaving, and I’m taking Gohan with me,” Chi-Chi said firmly. She walked back to her sword and picked it up, brandishing it at Piccolo even as he made no move to stop her. “I’d suggest you stay out of my way.”

“Mom?”

Piccolo humphed, not breaking eye contact with Chi-Chi. “I can’t allow you to do that,” Piccolo said. “Don’t you get it? The Saiyans could be here any day now, we need as many allies as we can muster if we don’t want the Earth destroyed.”

“Not my son,” Chi-Chi snapped.

“Mom?”

“Your son is one of the strongest people alive right now,” Piccolo retorted.

“He’s five!”

“Mom?”

“And he’ll be dead if we aren’t prepared for the Saiyans!”

“That’s not his responsibility, he’s a child.”

“Mom?”

“It isn’t a question of responsibility, it’s a question of  _necessity-”_

“All that’s necessary for Gohan is that he grows up into a competent and kind young man.”

“Mom?”

“Are you crazy? If we lose to the Saiyans, he’s never going to get a chance to-”

“ _HEY!”_

Gohan wiggled out of Chi-Chi’s grip and put himself between the two of them, his arms up as if he could hold them back should they come to blows. He shifted his gaze between his mother and his master, his mouth a thin line, making sure he had their attention. “I think we can talk about this in a more civilized manner,” Gohan said at length.

Chi-Chi huffed at the word ‘civilized’, and Piccolo openly scowled, but Gohan didn’t let it deter him. “What I’m saying is that it’s late, you two must both be exhausted from your fight, and there’s no real reason to be violent about this,” Gohan explained. “After all, we are all on the same side, right?” His gaze shifted between the two of them again. “R-right?”

It was Piccolo who conceded first. “Yes, we are,” he grunted.

Chi-Chi folded her arms over her chest and huffed. “I’ll allow it. For now,” she said.

Gohan physically relaxed and his face broke out into a smile again. “Great! Come on, let’s head back to our camp and get some rest,” he said.

Piccolo grunted something and picked his weighted clothing up, pulling the garments back on before jumping into the air and flying northwards.

“Can you fly, Mom?” Gohan asked, himself floating upwards.

“Somewhat,” Chi-Chi said, lifting off the ground. “I’ll admit, it takes a lot out of me still.”

Gohan beamed. “That’s okay! If you start to fall, I’ll be sure to catch you. It looks like that fight with Mr. Piccolo did a number on both of you,” Gohan said.

Chi-Chi could have wept. Eight months - eight months spent alone in a wasteland with  _King Piccolo,_ and Gohan was still the sweetest, most genuine little kid in the world. And more importantly, he was alive and thriving. Although, there was still the question of his mental development - it had been a while since he’d studied properly, that was certain.

Chi-Chi only made it halfway to the plateau in question before she faltered. Gohan made good on his word, swooping down underneath her to stop her from plummeting. “We’re almost there,” Gohan said, picking up his speed now that he was carrying Chi-Chi, instead of flying alongside her. “Hold on, Mom.”

“I’m fine, Gohan,” Chi-Chi insisted, letting out her high, jingling laugh, before promptly blacking out from exhaustion.

* * *

 

It was still dark out when Chi-Chi awoke, though it didn’t look like it would be that way for long. She sat up, somewhat disoriented, surveying her surroundings. A few paces away, ash and embers were encircled by hefty stones, a pile of firewood not too much further away. She looked down, seeing Gohan snuggled up by her leg, snoring lightly.

The sight of him made her heart lurch, and with it, memories of the night before.

Piccolo.

She turned her head and saw him meditating off the edge of the plateau, his back to her.

“You’re awake,” he said.

“Good catch,” Chi-Chi said, her voice dripping insincerity. She turned back to Gohan, her hand finding its way to his head, where she ran her fingers through his hair absently. It looked like he’d been cleaning his scalp regularly, though he still desperately needed a haircut. Come to think of it, so did Chi-Chi. Eight months in the wilderness will do that.

A faint shadow fell over the two of them, and Chi-Chi looked up to see Piccolo.

She opened her mouth to bark at him to mind his own business, but the look in his eye made her hold her tongue. He looked somber, almost sad. Almost.

Finally, Piccolo heaved a sigh and got to the point. “I can’t tell you how much I wish I could just send the two of you on your way and be done with it,” he said. “Believe me, I want nothing more than for this Saiyan menace to turn out to be a load of it. But the fact is…”

“I get it,” Chi-Chi said. She shook her head. “I know why you think you need his help - I’ve felt his power growing for almost my entire journey here. But you have to understand: he’s a  _child._ He’s my  _baby._ I can’t stand by and risk sending him to his death when there are plenty of other fighters to rise to the occasion.”

Piccolo snorted. “What, like Yamcha?”

Chi-Chi glared at him. “Quit trying to twist my words around, you know what I mean. People like Krillin, or Tenshinhan. Maybe even Master Roshi,” she said. “Anyone but my little Gohan.”

They fell into silence, with Chi-Chi absently toying with Gohan’s hair, and Piccolo taking a seat on the opposite side of the fire. She was just about to forget his presence when he spoke up again.

“I’m terrified for him,” he said.

Chi-Chi cocked a brow at him, expecting a ‘but’ or a ‘gotcha’, but none came. Piccolo’s gaze was fixed on Gohan, and he looked sick. He looked scared.

“I don’t like to admit it, but - but he’s grown on me,” Piccolo went on. “I’ve never cared for anyone, let alone have anyone concerned for my sake, but I’ve grown attached to him over these months. Maybe too much for my own good. I’m not sure what I’d do if he were to…” Piccolo clamped his jaw, unable to make his fear known. He didn’t have to, though - Chi-Chi’s mind filled in the blanks and it made her shudder. “Whatever.”

“So why make him fight?” asked Chi-Chi, unable to keep the pleading note out of her voice. “If you care about him like you claim, why force him into harm's way?”

“I’m not making him fight, or forcing him into anything. That - that might have been my plan at first, but things have changed,” Piccolo said. “Look, the Saiyans are coming whether we’re ready or not, and when they get here, they aren’t taking prisoners. Raditz was Goku and Gohan’s flesh and blood, and even he was willing to kill them both just to make a demonstration. When the others get here, I have no doubt they’ll be just as ruthless - and even if they kill everyone else on the planet, Gohan deserves a fighting chance.”

Gohan turned in his sleep, burying his face in Chi-Chi’s pantleg, breathing deeply and smiling. It warmed Chi-Chi’s heart to see him so at ease, so calm and so safe.

Unbidden, images of his blood splattered across the grass flashed in her mind, and she swallowed hard.

“Tell you what, Piccolo,” Chi-Chi said softly, her gaze not once leaving her son, “I think we can come to an agreement here.”

Chi-Chi’s eyes flickered up to Piccolo. Their gazes met, and understanding blossomed between them. Piccolo nodded, his mouth a grim line yet his expression still hopeful somehow.

“I’m listening," he said.


	7. The Saiyans Touch Down

“Krillin!”

Krillin looked up and his face split into a wide grin. “Yamcha, hey! Haven’t seen you since we left to Lookout,” Krillin said, slowing a bit so that Yamcha could catch up.

“I know, right? Good to see you, man,” Yamcha said as he fell into pace with Krillin. “God, am I glad it’s you. Think Tien’s gonna show? I haven’t felt his or Chiaotzu’s power so far.”

Krillin could only shrug. “He isn’t the flakey type. Actually…” Krillin turned his eyes toward the horizon, squinting a bit in the morning sun. “Well, if you ask me, it kinda seems like he’s here already. Or I think he is. There’s a power up ahead that seems strong enough to be Tien, anyway.”

Yamcha followed Krillin’s gaze, himself frowning as he focused on the ki in that direction. “One of those is definitely Piccolo,” Yamcha said. “I’d recognize it anywhere.”

“Mm-hm,” nodded Krillin. “And I’m positive the smaller one is Gohan. But the third…”

“Why would Tien go anywhere without Chiaotzu, though?” Yamcha wondered.

“I wouldn’t. What are you guys talking about?”

Both Krillin and Yamcha yelped, jerking around mid-air to face Tien. They’d been so focused on the power up ahead, they hadn’t noticed Tien - and Chiaotzu’s - approach. Chiaotzu chuckled at them, but Krillin quickly recovered.

“Hey, you’re here already,” Krillin said. “So that’s all of us… You don’t think it’s Yajirobe, do you?”

The resounding snorts were all the answer Krillin needed. “Dumb question, I know,” he sighed. “It seems kind of familiar, but I just can’t place it…”

“There’s one surefire way to find out,” Tien said. “Let’s not waste any more time - the Saiyans could be here any moment.”

The S-word immediately sobered the group, and they all took off for Piccolo and Gohan’s power as fast as they could.

With any luck, there’d be time for catching up later.

* * *

 

Chi-Chi stood with her arms over her chest, checking off her list of ‘Goku’s brainless martial arts friends’ as their energy came into focus. Krillin, Yamcha, Tenshinhan, Chiaotzu…

No Goku.

The sky had darkened just after dawn, the same inky, all-encompassing dark sky Piccolo swore was unique to the dragon being summoned. He surmised that meant Goku had finally been wished back to life. But if that were true, where was he?

Chi-Chi decided it was a question for later. For now, she had to make sure everyone was ready to face the Saiyans without him.

Krillin touched down first.

“Gohan, Piccolo - Chi-Chi?” he said.

Chi-Chi rolled her eyes. “Is the question mark really necessary, Krillin?” she asked.

Yamcha, Tien, and Chiaotzu all followed Krillin, each smiling at Gohan, leering at Piccolo, and raising their brows at Chi-Chi. She supposed the three of them were an odd trio - a five-year-old, his mother, and the self-anointed Demon King and scourge of the Earth.

“What - no, that’s not what I mean,” Krillin stammered, as he was want to do in Chi-Chi’s presence. “It’s just - we thought - uh, it’s good to see you again.”

Before Krillin could say or do anything to earn a spot on Chi-Chi’s shit list, Piccolo cut in. “If you’re done exchanging pleasantries, we’ve got more important things to discuss,” he said, businesslike.

Yamcha rolled his eyes, hands on his hips. “Drop the ‘tude, Piccolo. No one put you in charge,” he said.

Chi-Chi sighed through gritted teeth. “Yamcha, if you want to die before the Saiyans even get here, I’ll accommodate you, but everyone else here would generally prefer to live. So if it won’t give you an aneurysm to listen to someone smarter than you for a few minutes, save your sass for the Saiyans,” Chi-Chi said. Her eyes flashed dangerously, making Yamcha squirm just a bit, and he didn’t immediately argue.

Piccolo took that as his que to continue. “They could land any minute now. I’m sure you knuckle-heads have felt them approaching, otherwise you would have stayed put and continued whatever worthless training regimen you’ve concocted,” he said. Any objections about to be heard were cut short by the look on Chi-Chi’s face. “I’m also sure you’ve noticed that Goku isn’t here.”

“I saw the sky go black, same as it does whenever anyone summons the dragon,” Krillin piped up. “I haven’t been in contact with Master Roshi or Bulma in a while, but I’m pretty sure they wished Goku back already.”

“S-so where is he?” asked Gohan.

“Not here,” Piccolo said, deadpan. “Which means that for the time being, we’re on our own. We have numbers on our side, it being eight against two, but we shouldn’t underestimate them.” He gave Yamcha a pointed look, making the warrior huff indignantly.

A tingling sensation sprouted on the back of Chi-Chi’s neck, and her gaze snapped up towards the western sky. The others felt it, too, Krillin even going so far as to stumble.

“They’re here,” Krillin said, his voice barely above a whisper.

It was Yamcha who broke the following silence. “We should go meet them head-on!” he said, as sure of himself as ever. “I bet they’re expecting us to cower and hide, they won’t expect a full-on assault. Let’s show ‘em that Earth means business!”

“Don’t be so foolish,” Tien sighed, rubbing the side of his head as though Yamcha’s very presence had summoned a headache.

Yamcha looked confused. “What?”

Chi-Chi stepped in to spell it out for him. “Didn’t you feel them land? They’re in the thick of civilization,” she said. “If we go to them to fight, innocent people will be caught in the crossfire. We’re better off waiting for them here, where there’s no one around to-”

Her words died in her throat. They all felt the swell of energy, so many hundreds of miles away. They all knew what it meant, too.

“M-mom,” Gohan squeaked, his face ghostly white, “does it feel like there’s suddenly way fewer people in that direction?”

Chi-Chi swallowed her horror and spoke in level tones. “Yes, Gohan. It feels that way.”

“We’ll wish back everyone killed by the Saiyans after this is over,” Piccolo said, his voice suddenly breaking the tension.

“Whoa there, since when did you get a conscience?” laughed Yamcha. “The Big Bad King Piccolo suddenly cares about the good of the Earth? Well, I’ll be-”

“If you don’t can it now, the Saiyans will never have the pleasure of killing you themselves,” Piccolo snapped.

Tien, Chiaotzu, and Krillin laughed uneasily, shortly joined by Gohan, who never once let go of his mother’s pantleg. It was forced, but they all had a feeling it was going to be their last chance to laugh for a while - still, they soon fell into prolonged silence, waiting for the Saiyans to arrive. Before long, Krillin began making halfhearted attempts at conversation ("So, Piccolo, how's Chi-Chi treatin' you?" "Gosh, Gohan, have you gotten tall or what!" "How are things with you and Bulma, by the way...?") though they did little to ease the tension in the air.

"They're coming," Piccolo said, hopping off of his perch of mossy boulders.

Sure enough, Chi-Chi felt her spine buzz and the air thicken as two enormous powers closed in on them. They saw their shadows first, and they turned to the sky to see them.

The first one to land was massive, easily pushing seven feet in height and as wide as a three normal men standing shoulder-to-shoulder. The second was positively diminutive by comparison, hardly taller than Krillin. Chi-Chi knew better than to let their appearances fool her, though: one gander at their respective energies, and it was obvious who the bigger threat was.

“Took you long enough!” Yamcha shouted across the clearing, unable to help himself.

Chi-Chi rolled her eyes openly, even as the Saiyans laughed.

“Well, this is Earth’s best, is it?” drawled the smaller one. “How disappointing.”

“You’d think a planet capable of besting even the most pathetic Saiyans could come up with more of a challenge than this, given a year to prepare,” the larger one commented.

Yamcha flushed, and was only held back from attacking the Saiyans then and there by Tien’s warning glare.

The shorter one nodded. “Indeed. Let’s see here, five miserable Earthlings, the half-breed runt, and a Namek…” With each item on the list, he pressed the button on the side of his scouter, his grin growing wider and more cruel each time. “And none with a power level above two thousand, how terribly disappointing.”

“I’ll show you disappointing!” shouted Yamcha.

The short one smirked. “Yes, I’m positive you will. Nappa?”

The big one, Nappa, looked down at him. “Yes?”

“Go ahead and take care of them. Leave the Namek alive though, we might need him later.”

“You got it, Vegeta,” Nappa said, stretching from side to side and popping several joints in his neck and back. “Won’t take more than a few minutes!”

Nappa took a menacing step towards the group, and Krillin’s composure broke. In a moment, he was sputtering a mumbling in an attempt to postpone the imminent carnage. “N-n-now wait a minute,” Krillin started, “let’s not be too hasty about this - I mean, eight against one is hardly fair, r-right? And besides - we’ve all spent so long training, it would be a shame for everyone’s e-expertise to be lost in a group fight, right? Right?”

Chi-Chi ground her teeth together audibly. She pushed Gohan off her leg, towards Piccolo, and started across the clearing - brushing right passed Nappa, to his surprise.

“H-hey lady, where do you think you’re going?” Nappa barked, peeved at being ignored.

Chi-Chi threw a filthy look over her shoulder. “I’m going to talk to talk to the strong one,” she snapped.

Nappa seethed, but it quickly turned to a grin as Chi-Chi turned her back on him once more.

The spike of energy Chi-Chi felt was cut short by the smaller one, Vegeta, barking an order, “Nappa, cut it out.”

Chi-Chi peered over her shoulder at Nappa’s hulking form, his arms raised to strike at a moments notice. His muscles and face twitched in anticipation, itching to bring down the full force of his power on Chi-Chi. But it seemed taking a meager blow to his pride was a small price to pay for staying on Vegeta’s good side.

Mouth pressed in a grim line, Chi-Chi continued her walk and didn’t stop until she stood within an arm’s length of Vegeta. She glared down at him, as that was the only way to make proper eye contact at that distance, and spoke curtly: “I know for a fact that this isn’t how you want to do things.”

Vegeta quirked an eyebrow at her. “Is that so? What, you think we’ll suddenly develop bleeding hearts for you Earthlings once Nappa starts slaughtering you properly?” he asked, chuckling at the very notion.

“I’m not naive,” Chi-Chi snapped. “You didn’t honestly come to Earth hoping for an easy victory, did you?”

“What’s to hope for? You’re all still alive only because I decided to entertain your desire for conversation,” Vegeta said.

Chi-Chi pressed on as if he hadn’t spoken, which made Vegeta’s face twitch. “Your man there could fight any of us one-on-one and win, we can all tell that much just by looking at him. But what would be the fun of that? Beating each of us one at a time just sounds like busywork, if you ask me.”

“No one did. Get to your point,” Vegeta said.

“My point is that there’s one more of us still on his way here,” Chi-Chi said. “Stronger than each of us, and as eager for a fight as he is for anything else. What do you call him again? Kaka- Kora-?”

“Kakarot?” snorted Vegeta. “That low-class good-for-nothing traitor? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but he’s dead - along with his worthless brother, thank goodness.”

Chi-Chi smirked, arms folded over her chest as she waited for the pieces to click together in his head. It took a second, but soon realization flashed in his eyes, and Chi-Chi nodded and said, “Dragon balls. That’s right - he’s back from the dead, and he’s been training in the afterlife to fight you two all year. You wouldn’t want to disappoint him, would you?”

A conflicted look overtook Vegeta’s face. His eyes went dark as he considered, and Chi-Chi knew she had him.

He was a Saiyan, after all - he couldn’t resist a challenge.

“If we’re all dead anyway, why would he even bother coming here?” said Chi-Chi. “He could just get right to tracking down the dragon balls to wish us back, or at least so that your chances at a wish are ruined.”

That made Vegeta’s eyes flash. “Very well, Earthling - we’ll accommodate you,” he said.

“Vegeta!” came Nappa’s worthless objection.

“We’ll give Kakarot three hours to show up. If he doesn’t show his face in that time, as I suspect he won’t, then we’ll proceed with our plan to kill the rest of you one by one,” Vegeta said. For emphasis, he held up three fingers to Chi-Chi’s face. “Three hours - make the most of it.”

Unbidden, Chi-Chi's lips started to quirk into a smirk, but at the last second, her expression changed - to a wide, welcoming grin without a hint of malice or fear behind it. "I knew you'd see reason - see, that's why you're in charge," she said in her very best 'overbearing housewife' voice. With a girlish giggle, she flounced back across the clearing towards her friends and son, wishing she could turn around and see the look on the Saiyans' faces.

Judging by the horrified look on Krillin's face, the Saiyans' reactions were a sight to behold.

"Did you just - did you just  _condescend the strongest enemy we've ever faced?"_ Krillin managed as Chi-Chi settled back down.

"Who, me? I'd never," Chi-Chi huffed, pulling Gohan towards her and absently bushing the tangles out of his hair with her hands.

From across the clearing, she could have sworn she heard Vegeta muttering at Nappa, "Was I just  _condescended?_ Nappa, I want you to save her for me, no one disrespects the mighty Prince Vegeta..."

She had to grin.

 

 


	8. No One Left

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prolonged fighting scenes are difficult and boring to write so in the interest of having the chapter done in a timely manner and also not being painful to read, we'll just skip ahead to the part where everyone is dead.
> 
> also, this one's a week late! i got bored with the direction it was taking and started it again from scratch the night before it was originally supposed to go up, and then i dragged by feet about actually finishing it up lol. hopefully we're back on schedule now but we're out of pre-written chapter territory who who even knows what's going on. cheers!

Chi-Chi should have been there.

She should have been able to rush in, scoop Gohan up, and get out of the way before any ill befell anyone. She wasn't slow, literally or just in terms of reaction time, so why hadn't she moved? Probably for the same reason Gohan hadn't: the paralyzing horror of the situation. For her son, he was pinned in place by the sudden pressure of what was expected of him - and an irrational sense that he couldn't possibly do it. Nappa was too big, too strong, too frightening. Even if Gohan could hit him, there was no way he could finish him off. Chi-Chi wasn't frozen by the possibility of what she couldn't do, but from all the different possibilities ahead of her - kill Nappa, but how, swoop in and save Gohan, but she wasn't sure she was truly quick enough, scream and distract him, but she doubted that would work - and it culminated with inaction.

Piccolo hadn't gotten so distracted. Right when Chi-Chi was sure her baby boy would be murdered, he'd put himself between Nappa and Gohan. If he'd only had time to block, or jump out of the way, it would have been different. But as it was, the only thing Piccolo could do was cover Gohan with his body and endure Nappa's attack.

His body hadn't even dropped to the ground when feeling returned to Chi-Chi's limbs.

Gohan was safe, but Piccolo was dead.

Nappa was still alive.

She could fix that last one.

Nappa made the mistake of taking a split-second to gloat over the scene before him - Gohan, white-faced and shaking, trying to hear Piccolo's last muttered words - which gave Chi-Chi all the time she needed to end his life. Mid-laughter, a sword pierced his back and popped out of his chest like a bird from a cuckoo clock, blood spurting out with it.

"Wh-what the-?" Nappa gasped, but he was cut off as he choked on the blood pooling in his lung.

Chi-Chi didn't waste time on words, opting instead of stab and slice Nappa as much as she could during the brief moment of opportunity she'd created. He made the mistake of trying to turn around and face her, to fight her, which was his undoing - Chi-Chi managed a slice across his jugular, and while his hands flew up to his neck in a futile attempt to slow the bleeding, she plunged her sword through his heart.

Nappa collapsed, three hundred pounds of muscle falling to the ground with a dull  _thud._ Chi-Chi pulled her sword from his body, watching as the dirt soaked up his blood and turned black. She spared a sidelong glance at Vegeta, but he hadn't moved from his spot across the clearing. Once sure he wasn't going to attack right away, Chi-Chi stumbled the short distance from Nappa's body to Piccolo's.

"Are you alright?" she asked, falling into a kneel beside Gohan.

He barely glanced at her, eyes fixed on Piccolo. "You killed him?" Piccolo asked, the words coming out low and forced.

Chi-Chi nodded. "Cut him to bits."

"Coulda tried that a bit sooner."

Chi-Chi punched him lightly on the shoulder, eliciting a forced laugh. "Thanks," he murmured. "At least I'm not going to die for nothing."

"Don't say that!" Gohan said suddenly. "You're not going to die, Mr. Piccolo - we can fix you up and you'll be good as new, and-"

Piccolo mustered the strength to lift his hand up, silencing Gohan. "No. I'm going to die," Piccolo said with certainty. "Gohan..." Piccolo motioned for him to come closer, and Gohan leaned in. Chi-Chi shuffled back a bit, sensing that the words to transpire were private, even though she had a feeling she knew already the nature of them.

His final words imparted, Piccolo relaxed into the dirt as best he could, and was terribly quiet.

The rustle of fabric and dead weight moving across dirt caught Chi-Chi's attention: Krillin had managed to drag his body over to the other three - two - in spite of his broken bones and exhaustion. Somehow, he pulled himself into a sitting position, even mustering the strength the put a hand on Gohan's shoulder. "Hey, I'm sorry, Gohan," Krillin said. "I can't say I ever really got along with Piccolo, but I saw how close you guys have gotten and... well, there's no easy way to lose someone..."

Gohan's choked sobs were cut short by Vegeta.

"Are you simpering fools done drooling on yourselves over there?" he barked out from the other side of the battlefield. "I know battle is a foreign concept to you worms, but you don't win until you stand victorious over your enemies' bodies - and I'm still standing tall."

Krillin bared his teeth, but his body was too broken to be an effective outlet for his rage. "You're one to talk! The only reason you haven't been cut to ribbons yet is because you've been too much of a coward to actually face any of us so far!" Krillin shouted.

Even from a fifty-foot distance, Chi-Chi could see Vegeta's expression shift. The face that previously looked like it belonged next to the dictionary definition of 'boredom' darkened, eyes glinting dangerously. No shift in expression was as jarring as the spike in ki that sent shivers down Chi-Chi's spine, though. "Coward, eh?" he said. He threw his head back, his mouth twisting into a mockery of a grin, and went on, "Well, this is a character assassination I cannot abide. Alright, shortman, you got me - and I've got to defend my honor. So why don't I face all three of you at once?" Vegeta laughed cruelly, the sound echoing around the wasteland. "Yes, a crippled dwarf, a snot-nosed child, and a woman only just strong enough to kill  _Nappa._ I do have my work cut out for me, don't I?"

"Krillin, what were you thinking?" hissed Chi-Chi from the corner of her mouth.

Krillin flushed. "I - the thing is - I'm pretty sure I landed on my head on some point. Gimme a break!"

Gohan sniffed. "What are we gonna do?" he asked, anxiously wringing the front of Piccolo's tattered gi in his hands.

Her gaze shifted between the two of them, and she heaved a sigh. "We're going to fight him. More specifically,  _I'm_ going to fight him," Chi-Chi declared.

"What? No way - you can't go up against him by yourself," Krillin said.

In a heartbeat, Gohan was on his feet. "Y-yeah! I'll help you out, Mom!" said Gohan with his eyes ablaze.

Wordlessly and stern as ever, Chi-Chi shook her head. "Absolutely not. You're to stay out of this unless absolutely necessary, is that clear?" she said.

"But, Mom-"

Chi-Chi's mouth twitched into a frown, and she repeated, "Is that clear, Gohan?"

It was clear, indeed. Her tone beckoned no argument, so Gohan hung his head and slumped back down by Piccolo's side. "Yes, Mom," he murmured.

Satisfied, Chi-Chi's face broke out into an inappropriately cheery smile. "That's my boy! Now, keep Krillin out of trouble, and I'll deal with this troll doll over here," she said too-sweetly. With that, she spun on her heel and marched towards Vegeta.

He still had yet to move from his spot over by the boulders, arms folded over his chest. He barely twitched as Chi-Chi approached him, but his eyes followed her every step.

"Ah, the first to die uselessly by my hand," he drawled as she approached. "At least you're a proper fighter, not a child or already half-dead. I shouldn't have let Nappa have all the fun."

When Chi-Chi didn't react to his taunt, he sneered. "Oh, stoicism now, is it? I'd say you have guts, but it's far more likely you actually just lack brains," Vegeta went on.

Chi-Chi's brow twitched into a glare, and she settled into the usual turtle-style stance - legs braced, arms up, ready to fight. Her sword hung from a loop in her belt, ready to go whenever she was. Vegeta rolled his eyes, and finally moved from his perch at the edge of the battlefield. He adjusted his gloves as he moved in, as if the battle about to take place was more of a chore than anything else. "If you're so eager to die, I won't keep you-" he started to mutter.

Mid-sentence, Chi-Chi moved in, taking off so fast she all but disappeared from view. Vegeta had just enough time to raise his eyebrows before she reappeared right behind him. Her sword glinted in the sunlight as it swung through the air towards Vegeta, but at the last second, it came to an abrupt stop. Vegeta craned his neck to leer at Chi-Chi from the corner of his eye, one arm raised above his head with the sword caught in the palm of his hand. "Is this the best Earth has to offer?" he wondered, an infuriating grin playing on his lips.

Chi-Chi jumped back, putting distance between herself and Vegeta as quickly as possible - but Vegeta was quicker.

Her feet met solid ground, and not a moment after, his fist collided with her stomach - lifting her up again. Her whole body spasmed and she lost hold of her sword, her hands opting instead to claw uselessly at Vegeta's fist, to get it off of her so she could breathe.

Vegeta laughed as he let Chi-Chi fall back into the dirt. "I don't know what I expected, but you didn't even meet that," he chortled.

With great difficulty, Chi-Chi managed to stand. She spat a gob of blood into the dirt, and settled once more into her stance - her eyes never once leaving Vegeta.

He rolled his eyes at her. "You don't learn very quick, do you?" he asked.

"Try me," Chi-Chi seethed.

The infuriating smirk slipped off his face just a tad. "Whatever you say," Vegeta said.

A heartbeat passed while each waited for the other to make the first move, then they both disappeared from sight.

* * *

Gohan watched the altercation from the sidelines, digging his fists into the dirt as his eyes struggled to follow the action.

"We have to do something, Krillin," Gohan said - more to himself than to Krillin, as a matter of fact.

Krillin scooted a bit closer to Gohan, putting his hand on the kid's shoulder as a show of comfort and as a way to quickly stop him if he tried getting involved. "There's nothing we can do, kid," Krillin said. "You can feel how strong that guy is, right?"

"Yeah, and Mom's fighting him all by herself," said Gohan. "What if something happens to her? Mr. Piccolo is - well - w-we don't have the dragon balls anymore, s-so if she dies, then..."

Krillin tightened his grip on Gohan just a bit. An empathetic squeeze and a tether. "She's gonna be fine, I promise. But you need to stay out of the way so that she can focus on the fight, alright?" Krillin said.

Gohan took his eyes off the fight for a split-second to search Krillin's face for signs of insincerity or uneasiness, and he found none. Krillin had manipulated his expression to be perfectly carefree and sure, utterly at ease and completely confident in their eventual safety and victory. Gohan was hardly a stupid child, though, and was far more realistic and perceptive than Krillin expected of a five-year-old. Given the circumstances, Gohan could conclude that the only reason Krillin looked so sure of himself was that he was, in fact, full of it.

Which meant Chi-Chi was absolutely in danger.

Baring his teeth, Gohan jerked Krillin's hand off of his shoulder and let his rage carry him into the battle - deaf to Krillin's objections.

* * *

Vegeta landed a hit against Chi-Chi's back, and she plummeted towards the Earth. She landed face-first on the ground with a dull  _thud,_ kicking up dust and dirt along the way. Shaking, drained of energy and every inch of her aching, Chi-Chi tried to lift herself off of the ground. Her efforts were thwarted as Vegeta approached her from behind, and pushed her gracelessly back into the ground with his boot.

"This has been a snooze," he said, raising one hand a gathering ki in his palm. "Don't feel bad, you've done better than I expected of any Earthling. And you killed Nappa for me, which I'm sure I would have had to do myself at some point. He wasn't keeping up with me, and was bound to become dead weight sooner or later, after all. But, you've more than served your purpose, so-"

Something small and brimming with energy slammed into Vegeta's head from the side, knocking him over.

Chi-Chi scrambled up, eyes widening in horror as she recognized the energy: Gohan.

He'd taken Vegeta by surprise, and was making use of the edge that gave him. Small but powerful fists flew around Vegeta's head and shoulders in a flurry, too fast to block, and while not much compared to Vegeta's resilience, still incredibly distracting.

"STOP - HURTING - MY - MOM!" Gohan shouted as he pummeled Vegeta.

Whatever advantage Gohan had quickly wore off, and Vegeta caught either of Gohan's arms and held him aloft. Gohan tried to kick, but Vegeta swiftly brought the boy forward and knocked their heads together, hard enough the split the skin over Gohan's brow. He tossed Gohan aside and regained his composure, wiping blood from his lip where Gohan had punched him. "I have to admit, I didn't realize I had a whole little family on my hands here," Vegeta seethed. "Kakarot's brat, of course, and Kakarot's Earthling sweetheart. I guess I should have realized, but to be honest, I didn't think he had the sense choose a mate with any fight in her."

Chi-Chi was barely paying attention - she was focused on Gohan. He'd sat up, and was cradling his bleeding forehead. If he had lasting brain damage from this fight, she was going to...

"I was going to just slaughter you all and carry on with this whole wishing business, but since Kakarot's whole clan is here, I might as well draw things out," Vegeta mused. A wicked grin spread across his face. "I can't wait to see his expression when I kill you both. Yes, I'll save you two for later, provided Kakarot shows his cowardly face at all-"

Vegeta clamped his mouth shut as an orange blur swooped into the battlefield.

He touched down with a soft  _thump,_ an effect of the weighted shoes, and - in an act that both amused and frustrated Vegeta - immediately turned his back on the Saiyan, opting instead to see to Chi-Chi and Gohan.

"I got here as fast as I could," said Goku. "What all did I miss?"


	9. Dropping the Spirit Bomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yikes! i completely forgot the details of the goku vs vegeta fight and do NOT care to look it up again!

Vegeta was irritated by Goku's sudden arrival, but he couldn't cover up how intrigued he was. He watched from a distance while Goku huddled by Chi-Chi, Gohan, and Krillin, and they filled him in on the events prior to his arrival.

"Chi-Chi finally took Nappa down, and - well - you saw her fighting Vegeta when you showed up," Krillin finished - sitting up unaided after Goku had insisted he take part of a senzu bean. The rest of the senzu had been split between Chi-Chi and Gohan - it didn't fully heal them, but it eased the ache and exhaustion that had built up over the course of the fight.

Goku nodded slowly, his eyes shifting over to Vegeta, who seemed to loom over them despite his distance and unimpressive stature. The look in his eye almost made Chi-Chi shudder; she'd only seen him look like that when he had fought Piccolo over five years ago. "I see," he said slowly. "This Vegeta's not gonna be easy to beat, I can tell you that much..."

Mood turning on a dime, much like Chi-Chi's was prone to do, Goku beamed and rustled Gohan's hair. "I'll do my best though! He may be tough, but so am I. I'll give him a run for his money, at least," Goku said.

Gohan seemed to buzz with anticipation, and he jumped to his feet. "I-I'll help you, Dad! I could get close and - um - scratch his eyes so he can't see! Or I'll sneak in with a sharp rock and sever his achilles-"

With time, Gohan certainly could have come up with countless other increasingly-painful and irritating ways he could harm Vegeta, but Goku just shook his head and silenced him there. "Out of the question, Gohan," he said.

Gohan's face fell. "But-"

"No buts," Chi-Chi chimed in. She only needed to make eye contact with Goku for a split-second for them to understand each other perfectly. She frowned - she didn't like it one bit, but she supposed it was best. "You and I will only get in Daddy's way. It's best we give him some space to work, alright?"

Krillin eyed her as if she'd sprouted an extra head, while Gohan hung his in disappointment. "Chi-Chi, are you serio-?" he started, but he balked when met with twin glares from Goku and Chi-Chi both. "I mean- yeah, Gohan. Your dad's obviously gotten a lot stronger..."

"Right, we'll head back home then," Chi-Chi said in a tone that beckoned no argument. She beamed at Goku, a performance for their son, and said, "I'll go ahead and start dinner. You better not be late, understand?"

Goku grinned right back at her, looking as confident as he ever had. The glint in his eye betrayed him, though. Chi-Chi could tell he was taking this much more seriously than he was letting on. Her heart lurched with the thought of losing him again, and she stood on the tips of her toes to plant a kiss on his jaw (she always forgot how tall he was). "I said, do you understand?" she asked again.

"Yeah - you bet, Chi-Chi," Goku said, his eyes knowing. He gave her a quick wink. "I'll be there."

With one last heartfelt smile, Chi-Chi turned to Gohan and Krillin and once again was all business. "Okay, you two, let's get moving. Krillin, can you fly on your own?" she asked.

Krillin jumped up. "Yep, that senzu fixed me up good," he confirmed. He pounded his chest with a fist to demonstrate.

Chi-Chi nodded. "Good. Gohan, I want you to stay close to me. Let's head home now," she said.

Gohan nodded. "Y-yeah," he said.

Krillin jumped up and took off in the direction of Mount Paozu, but Gohan hesitated to follow him. "Dad?"

"Yeah, Gohan?" answered Goku.

Chi-Chi expected Gohan to wish him luck, or say he missed him, that he loved him, but his face hardened like stone and he said, "Don't mess around, okay?" He waited for Goku to nod, then kicked off after Krillin without another word.

* * *

 Eventually, they couldn't ignore the wild fluctuation of ki and strange lights from the battle behind them.

Gohan froze first, eyes fixed on the horizon with his mouth agape. Chi-Chi was next - stopping more out of concern for Gohan rather than anything else. Krillin flew a bit further, before looping back around to meet them. "Hey, what's the idea? Mount Paozu isn't gonna grow legs and meet us here," he said.

"It's Goku," Chi-Chi said.

"He'll be fine-"

"No he won't!" Gohan snapped, sounding more scared than angry. "Don't you feel it, Krillin? His energy's fading - he's in trouble! We have to help him."

 With a burst of energy that made Krillin and Chi-Chi shield their eyes, Gohan shot off in the direction of the battle. In seconds, he was just a pinprick moving steadily over the horizon. Krillin looked to Chi-Chi with his mouth agape. "Y-you're not just gonna let him run off like that alone, are you? It's dangerous!" he said.

Chi-Chi nodded solemnly. "It is dangerous," she agreed. "And no, I'm not letting him go alone."

Krillin picked up on her wording and his face faded a shade or two. "O-oh," he said. He gulped, and his resolve returned. "We better get going, then."

They started after Gohan at top speed.

* * *

 Vegeta didn't often have to resort to his Great Ape form, but Earth was brimming with surprises.

What wasn't surprising was the way the battle had turned once he'd transformed. As soon as Vegeta had shot his artificial moon into the air, Kakarot hadn't stood a chance. He was dozens of times stronger and more resilient as the mighty Oozaru, with no loss of speed of reactivity. He picked out Kakarot's garishly orange gi among the rocks, scooped him up in his fists, and crushed him like a bug in his hands.

_And once I've dealt with Kakarot, I'll end the lives of his half-breed son and pathetic Earthling wife as wel-_

Somethings  _buzzed_ around the base of his neck, a tickling sensation that he scarcely flinched at, but was quickly followed by seven consecutive ki blasts to the back of his skull. The energy seared his fur and rattled his brain, the pain surging out from the spot of impact along the veins in his skin. Vegeta let out an angry roar and dropped Kakarot unceremoniously into the dirt, his hands grasping automatically at his fresh injury.

Wildly, Vegeta looked around, furiously seething with pain all the while. He only managed to catch a glimpse of his assailants, but that was all he needed to identify them: Kakarot's family. He should have known.

Vegeta stomped towards the rock formations they had fled to, intent on crushing them all one by one for daring to interfere with his fight. The tingle returned though, and this time Vegeta knew what would follow. He stepped quickly to the side, just in time to miss being sliced by a spinning disc of energy. And a good thing, too - it sliced clean through the rocks, spinning dangerously through the air, lethal until it would eventually dissipate.

Glaring, Vegeta found the source of the attack.

_Ah, yes. The bald one._

Vegeta let out an Earth-shaking roar, saliva flying from his open maw with the force of his battlecry. It was loud enough and horrible enough to strike the bald one pale and immobile. Vegeta took the opportunity to snatch him out of the air and crush him in his fist.

The bald one let out an ear-splitting scream as Vegeta's fingers closed around him, which would have delighted the Saiyan prince had it not been so irritating. " _I am going to eat you alive, you worthless Earthling-"_

The next thing Vegeta knew, the sky was getting further away, and the bald one was getting much, much more difficult to crush in a single fist.

Realization hit him right before he hit the ground.

_Those sons of bitches cut off my tail - I'll kill them for that!_ Any further scheming was cut short by the bald one landing on his face.

* * *

Chi-Chi landed gracefully, though hardly lightly, with a thin tendril of blood from Vegeta's severed tail arcing behind her blade. She spun around in time to see Vegeta land like a fallen ragdoll in the dirt, followed closely by Krillin. In the rocks behind them, Gohan was still hopping over boulders and dodging through crevices in the stone, looking for Goku.

Hopefully, Chi-Chi had bought him some time.

Chi-Chi's attention shifted back to Vegeta, who shoved Krillin off of himself so violently that he was thrown face-first into another rock formation. The Saiyan prince stumbled upright, wiping the blood from his chin with the back of his glove. Battered armor, bleeding face, hunched over and seething - he looked positively feral. Chi-Chi fixed him with her coldest, most calculating glare, and settled into a stance with her sword raised. Vegeta seemed to be in the habit of keeping his tail around his waist, so she couldn't rely on his balance being thrown off from losing it - still, it was an appendage he'd had all his life. Surely losing it would give Chi-Chi some kind of weakness to exploit?

If there was one, Chi-Chi didn't have time to pick it out and strategize - Vegeta lunged at her, roaring, ki flashing in his palms as lethal as it was blinding. All she could do was block, crying out in pain against the searing energy.

She left herself open a moment too long, and Vegeta pummeled her in the gut and chest - one punch after another, making her spit blood and saliva. She brought the pommel of her sword down on Vegeta's head, which made him flinch long enough for her to put healthy distance between them and catch her breath. When he lunged at her again, she was ready - parrying each blow, sword all but forgotten. Fists, kicks, knees, and elbows were matched in a flurry, each contact pulsing with energy and rattling Chi-Chi's bones.

It bears being said, however, that she gave as good as she got.

A particularly well-executed punch knocked Vegeta's head back and sent a tooth flying. He spat blood and bared his remaining teeth in a reddened snarl, and his assault didn't ease up a bit.

_Where does he get all this damn energy from?_ thought Chi-Chi. It must have been a Saiyan thing - her Goku had been through battles that would have killed anyone else, and had walked away from each one perfectly fine and dandy, save for the obvious exception. But if her sparring sessions with Goku were any evidence at all, the Saiyans couldn't hold out forever. All she had to do was hold out for a little longer.

That plan was quickly dashed. Vegeta jumped in the air, spinning and kicking Chi-Chi so hard in the side of the head that she couldn't see anything but streaks of light. Suddenly disoriented, she lost her balance and fell on her rear, clutching her bleeding ear and rapidly-bruising jaw. Where was she? What was going on?

Vegeta stood over her, blotting out the light. For a moment, Chi-Chi didn't recognize him - all she could think of was strangling whatever it was that was making the high-pitched squealing noise. He started talking, a muffled and indistinguishable mess of a sound she only recognized as words by the flapping of his gab. Chi-Chi blinked, trying to figure out who the strange little man was and what he was trying to say.

Behind him, people were moving around - one of them small, with dark hair, and a violet gi.

_That's Gohan!_ Chi-Chi's brain supplied readily.

All at once, the pieces clicked back into place - even if her hearing hadn't - and Chi-Chi lunged at Vegeta with both fists. They landed, one over the other, in his sternum and abdomen. Vegeta flew back a few paces and Chi-Chi jumped back even further. She followed up with a flurry of energy blasts, all small and negligible on their own, but which congealed into an explosive and inescapable attack. Chi-Chi's hearing was still ruined from Vegeta's kick, but based on the shaking Earth alone, the sound must have been uproarious.

Finally, with no ki to spare, Chi-Chi collapsed onto her knees. Blood ran down her nose, chin, and the side of her face, she was covered in cuts, bruises, burns, and broken bones, every inch of her was exhausted - it was all she could do just to stay conscious. Even staying upright was beyond her at that point. Chi-Chi fell onto her side, panting, eyes unfocused as she gazed into the settling dust -

\- where Vegeta was getting up.

_Fuck,_ she would have said aloud if she could.

He had obviously been affected by Chi-Chi's assault, but not as much as she had. He was, after all, still on his feet - blinded in one eye, with dark red saturating his bodysuit and dripping down his torso, but very much vertical. He said something that Chi-Chi wouldn't have been able to make out even if she could hear properly, and rose one hand to the sky. Energy balled in his hand, and his gazed was fixed squarely on Chi-Chi.

_Gohan, I'm so sorry-_

Vegeta's attack was cut short by a massive ball of energy hurtling directly at him. He jumped out of the way just in time, alerted by the long shadow suddenly cast before him, but it was still en route for Chi-Chi.

_Goku, you son of a-_

Crisp as an autumn morning, Goku's voice cut through Chi-Chi's impaired hearing. " _Chi-Chi, listen to me-"_ he started.

No, it was coming from inside of her head. Since when was he a telepath?

" _I'll tell you later - for now, you just have to bounce the Spirit Bomb back at Vegeta, and quick. We only have this one chance!"_

Surely that thing would blow her up, though.

" _It won't hurt you, I promise. You're pure of heart, but if it dissipates on you, it's wasted. I don't think we can hold out long enough for me to make another one."_

Chi-Chi forced herself to her feet, raising her arms in preparation for the gargantuan ball of energy coming her way. She quickly picked out Vegeta's form in the sky, and calculated the angle to send the Spirit Bomb right at him.

" _Thank you, Chi-Chi! You're the best, love ya!"_

"Get out of my head already," growled Chi-Chi.

It was all she had time to say before the Spirit Bomb was right on her. Chi-Chi let out a roar as she mustered up the last of her energy and volleyed the giant orb into the sky. It was hot, but not searing - more like a sunbath than a fire - and heavier than anything Chi-Chi had hit before. It did the trick, though: the Spirit Bomb was sent flying upwards at Vegeta. Though Chi-Chi was still deaf, Goku, Gohan, and Krillin weren't, and all listened in awe of the ear-splitting shriek that rung out from the sky. Chi-Chi did get the full effect of the light, though. It was like someone had popped a star like a balloon, and instead of the light dying off slowly over a thousand years, it all burst out at once in a retina-searing explosion.

It was all gone as soon as it came, and before long Chi-Chi's eyes had readjusted. The clearing looked as dark as night after the explosion of the Spirit Bomb, but Chi-Chi could pick out the formations, Gohan as he tentatively moved around the rocks, and - chiefly - Vegeta.

The battlefield was getting brighter by the second. Chi-Chi caught a flash of light bounce off a tiny remote in Vegeta's hand, and not a few seconds later, a spherical pod had landed a ways off.

_That coward,_ though Chi-Chi with a curl of her lip.  _Short, rude, good-for-nothing COWARD!_

With strength Chi-Chi didn't know she had, she stomped the distance between herself and Vegeta, pausing only to scoop her sword up in her hand. It felt like it weighed a tonne, but she didn't slow down one bit. She was a woman on a mission, and she wouldn't rest until she saw it through.

Vegeta had been deeply affected by the Spirit Bomb. He was reduced to crawling through the dirt on his stomach to reach his pod, dragging his legs behind him as dead weight. The sight of him made Chi-Chi livid, his running away made fury rise in her throat like bile, and she kicked him hard in the ribs so he knew it. The force of her kick spun Vegeta onto his back, and he cried out in pain.

"Worm," seethed Chi-Chi. "Scoundrel, bastard, son-of-a-bitch,  _coward-"_ If Chi-Chi could hear, she'd realize she was shouting. As it was, her voice continued to rise in volume and grow more potent with anger.

Vegeta raised his arm - to do what, even he didn't know. He was in no fit condition to fight - and Chi-Chi kicked him squarely in the face. Vegeta tried to get out of her rage, but Chi-Chi fixed him in place with the tip of her blade, which drew a drop of blood right over his adam's apple.

"You think you can come to our planet, kill our friends,  _threaten my son,_ and just run away the moment things get too  _sticky_ for you? You ought to be ashamed of yourself! To think, you call yourself a warrior..." Chi-Chi spat onto Vegeta's busted armor. "Everyone you've faced today is a thousand times the fighter you could ever hope to be. Yamcha died a true warrior, Piccolo died a hero, Tien and Chiaotzu died with honor - and you  _dare_ try to  _run away?"  
_

Chi-Chi still couldn't hear, but she could read Vegeta's lips plainly enough.

"Don't you call me 'coward'," he said slowly.

He was met with another kick in the face, and fresh blood gushing from his nose. Vegeta protested, clutching his face and trying to get away from Chi-Chi, to no avail.

"Men who run from the end instead of facing it with dignity are cowards," Chi-Chi said. "But if 'coward' is too insensitive for you, let's just go with 'dead' instead."

She raised her sword, ready to bring it down on him and end this sordid business once and for all. Vegeta's one good eye widened just a bit at the blade glistening in the light, and Chi-Chi finally saw something besides snide superiority or rage in his expression: fear. If she hadn't savored it for as long as she had, Vegeta would have died there on Earth - but someone caught her by the arm before she could bring the steel down on Vegeta.

Chi-Chi looked over, bewildered, at Krillin.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" asked Chi-Chi, each word delivered too-loudly and making Krillin cringe.

He said something very quickly that Chi-Chi couldn't catch, and the look of incomprehension must have tipped Krillin off. He took a step back and gestured over by a few boulders where Gohan was helping Goku to stand. Slowly, Goku shook his head.

" _Let him live, Chi-Chi."_

"Why?" she barked back audibly.

" _He hasn't killed anyone on Earth. You told me it was the other fella, the big one you killed, who wrought all the havoc here. He threatened us, beat us all silly, but..."_

"Are you crazy, Goku?" Chi-Chi demanded. "This man is a monster! Do you think he's gonna take this sitting down? If we let him go now, he'll turn around and come right back to Earth and blow the whole planet up. Not to mention what he must have done to other people on planets besides Earth!"

Krillin said something to Goku that Chi-Chi couldn't make out, but based on his facial expression alone, he sided with her.

But Goku wasn't dissuaded. He spoke the next few words aloud, simultaneously telepathing them to Chi-Chi, so that everyone could hear: " _If Vegeta comes back to Earth after this, we won't let him leave a second time. Simple as that."_

Chi-Chi looked between her husband, completely calm and stoic despite his broken body, and Vegeta - the bewildered breaker of things - turning this over in her head. She heaved a sigh, and lowered her sword. "Father always said half of marriage was compromise," she said, this time so quiet the only ones to hear her were Vegeta and Krillin. With her mind made up, she sheathed her sword, watching Vegeta physically relax from the corner of her eye.

_He's not getting a friendly farewell, though,_ Chi-Chi thought.

" _Of course not. Scare him good for the Earth, would ya?"_ Goku said inside her mind.

Chi-Chi grabbed Vegeta by the front of his shattered armor, and pulled him close to her face. She could practically taste the blood on him, pungent and coppery, but more satisfying was the visible fear in his eyes. In a shockingly level tone for someone with no hearing, she said, "Don't - come - back. Got it?" She saw his mouth twitch, as if he were about to agree, which was all the confirmation she needed.

Unceremoniously, Chi-Chi hurled Vegeta directly into the pod, so forcefully that the whole thing rolled on impact. One final 'fuck you' to the man who had tried to kill her entire family. It was better than he deserved, as far as Chi-Chi was concerned.

The pod closed and whirred to life, and she and Krillin got out of the way just in time to not be knocked over by it taking off. The force of the pod leaving Earth was enough to make Chi-Chi's hair whip around her face wildly, and she shielded her eyes from the wind. By the time she looked up, Vegeta's spacepod was just a little dot in the sky, and it was gone not a moment later.

_Until next time,_ thought Chi-Chi grimly,  _asshole._


	10. Vegeta Goes Rogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (just a short chapter to segue into more chi-chi business)

If Vegeta had been conscious for the trip, thinking about his time on Earth would have driven him mad.

As it was, he was plagued by circular nightmares about Kakarot and Earth and swords and that woman - what had Kakarot called her? -  _Chi-Chi._ If Kakarot was a disgrace to the Saiyans in every other way, he had least had the decency to find a mate with some guts. Vegeta would have been impressed if she hadn't held him at swordpoint, kicked him in the face, spat on him, tossed him around like a child, called him a coward, and then had the gall to let him live.

They'd let him live. Why the hell had they let him live?

The pod went out of stasis as it prepared to land on one of the many way stations Frieza had positioned across the universe. Vegeta grimaced as it impacted and his broken body was jostled, and with his last remaining bit of consciousness, he slammed the button to open the pod. He let his body fall out of the opening, snarling at the resounding gasps from his little 'welcome party' - and then everything went black.

When he awoke again, it was when the fluid was drained from his healing tank. Vegeta ran his tongue around the inside of his mouth, taking attendance of all his teeth. It seemed they managed to regrow the one  _Chi-Chi_ (he couldn't think the name without his face twitching in disgust) had kicked out. His tail... that was a different story. No matter. The power he had gained as a result of the battle had already sent him careening through the limits set by his Great Ape form. _In fact,_ he thought with a wicked smirk, _I may even be strong enough now to face Frieza._

Vegeta fixed his expression into his usual scowl before tugging the mouthpiece off and exiting the tank.

Well, maybe facing Frieza was still a bit ambitious. It was hardly as though Vegeta had any witless lackeys laying about for him to sacrifice to test the waters. He needed insurance - he needed immortality.

And if he couldn't get it on Earth, he would have to get it on Namek. The Namekians had created the dragon balls - surely they must have a set of their own. Vegeta was sure he could convince them to let him 'borrow' them. He could be very persuasive when he wanted to, after all.

"-and Cui needed to have a word with you as well-" The medic's voice suddenly cut through Vegeta's busy thoughts as he was mid-way through dressing himself.

Vegeta paused with one arm through the opening in his armor. "What of?" he demanded shortly, making sure to mask his excitement with gruff indifference. He couldn't wait for a chance to lord his new power over that repulsive bottom-feeder.

"He didn't say, exactly," hummed the medic, already distracted as they paged through stacks of medical notes on their desk. "Something about you leaving your last mission for - where was it, Earth? It was Earth, wasn't it?"

Vegeta pulled his body armor on all the way. "Indeed."

"I guess it's just some bureaucratic nonsense he's been tasked with," said the medic with a wave of their hand. "I hear the higher-ups are wanting to put him in a leadership position, which I suppose is reason enough to task him with such trifling matters."

"Apparently. Well, I wouldn't want to keep him waiting," Vegeta said, sarcasm edging his words. "Where has he got to?"

The medic scratched their chin. "Hmm, training room? He usually is around this time."

Fully healed and clad in fresh armor, Vegeta made for the door.

"Oh- uh, Vegeta?"

Vegeta froze mid-step, and turned around to see the medic - still at their desk - lofting a bright red scouter in their hand. "You'll be needing this?" they said with the slightest hint of a smirk.

 _They think I'm a dunce,_ Vegeta realized, and it took all of his self-control not to burst out laughing. They could think that - in fact, everyone could think that, if they wished. It would only make it that much more satisfying to see the look of horrible realization on their faces before he blew them all to pieces.

"My bad," Vegeta said, smiling with a sickly sweetness that made the medic frown.

He ducked back into the room and swiped the scouter out of the medic's hand with just a bit more violence than necessary, and made a show of fixing it over his ear. He left without another word, focusing on not walking too fast on his way to the training room. If Vegeta were any less disciplined, he would have skipped. From his perspective, the path to victory was clear: first he'd defeat and humiliate Cui, then he'd become immortal and do the same to Frieza, and after that, the universe was his oyster. And it all started in the training room...

Or, as it turned out, just outside the training room.

"Well, well, well, look who it is," came Cui with a distinctive lisp.

Vegeta peered over his shoulder at Cui, in all his aquatic purple glory, and suppressed a smirk. "What did you want, Cui?" he asked.

Cui came up behind him and clapped him on the shoulder, a show of affection that only could have disgusted Vegeta more if it were in any way genuine. "Aw, what's the rush, little prince? Afraid you're in trouble? Worried Lord Frieza's going to put you in a time out or send you to bed without dinner?" Cui cooed.

Vegeta shrugged the hand off of his shoulder and turned around to face Cui, arms folded over his chest. "Would you get to point already? I heard you had business with me, but if all you wanted to say was that Frieza misses me, I think I have better things to do," snapped Vegeta.

"Hey, hey, cool it," said Cui. "Lord Frieza's just curious about a few things - like why you ditched your mission to go to Earth, and why Nappa and Raditz didn't come back with you, and why you neglected to talk to anyone about any of it." Cui wiggled a finger at Vegeta as though he were chiding a disobedient puppy. "You haven't gone rogue on us, have you, little prince?"

"More pressing matters, they were too stupid to live, and I don't care about anyone's feelings - and to answer your last question, not at the moment, though if you don't get your hand out of my face in the next few seconds I might change my mind," Vegeta said.

Cui grinned, but lowered his hand anyway. "Well, uh... we'll need to make a more detailed report, but-"

"Where is the bastard, anyway?" asked Vegeta, making a point to look around the hallway as if Frieza were just around the corner.

"Bastar- Lord Frieza? Why..." Cui's grin grew wider and more infuriating. "He left for a little backwater planet not too long ago. Let's see, what was it called... That's it,  _Namek."_

Vegeta's blood ran cold. "Really."

"Really," Cui said. 

"And why exactly is he going to this... Namek?"

"Oh, I think you know perfectly well why he's going to Namek," Cui said. He tapped his scouter, and gave Vegeta a little wink. "After all, you did tip him off."

 _Fuck._ Vegeta dropped all social pretenses and shoved Cui out of the way, knocking him into a gaggle of cadets and causing an absolute ruckus along the way. Cui shouted at him to freeze, but Vegeta was all but flying down the hallway, maneuvering through the corridors with the dexterity of someone who had grown up there - and the speed of someone in a panicked frenzy.

All at once, he burst out into the open, knocking several soldiers over while he was at it. Someone was getting ready to board a pod and take off on official Frieza Force business - Vegeta grabbed them by the back of their armor and threw them out of the way, before jumping backwards into the pod and pulling the door closed. Through the domed window, he could see Cui coming after him with a dozen soldiers in tow. They did no good, however. Vegeta wasted no time punching in the coordinates for Namek, and scarcely bothered watching their gaping faces as the spacecraft took off into the vast universe.

How could he have been blindsided like this? Vegeta took the scouter off of his face, regarding it with disgust. He'd been a fool to assume his reliance on the damn gadget wouldn't come back to bite him in the ass. For a brief moment, he was tempted to just smash it in his fist and be done with it, but his tactician's senses got the better of him. Frieza might know about dragon balls, but there was no way he could know about Vegeta learning to sense energy. The scouter could still come in handy later as a decoy.

Furious, and with nowhere to direct his anger outward, Vegeta settled deeper into the seat and turned the scouter off completely.

 _This is fine,_ he told himself. _So Frieza's after immortality as well - whatever. I'll just have to gather those damn dragon balls up before he does. Besides, I bet the stupid bastard doesn't even know how to use them..._

A thought that Vegeta wouldn't entertain was that he, also, had no clue how to use the dragon balls.

But that, as far as he was concerned, was a problem for when he got to Namek.


	11. Chi-Chi's Rule

The following week was simultaneously the quickest and most painstakingly slow week of Chi-Chi's life. At first, she could do little more than sit in her hospital bed and twiddle her thumbs - until her father put yarn and needles in her hands and she could resume work on the sweater she wanted Gohan to wear for his next birthday. Gohan spent the first few days sitting at the foot of her bed with a book on sign language open in his lap, clumsily translating the conversation in the room.

According to the doctor, Chi-Chi's eardrums had been ruptured so badly it was unlikely she'd ever fully recover her hearing, but it ought to be serviceable after a couple of months. As it was, Chi-Chi struggled to remain part of the conversation. It was better at the end of the first week, as voices became slightly more distinct and she got better at reading lips and Gohan got better at sign language. It had gotten to the point that Chi-Chi could understand all of the terrible ideas being thrown about - and she could chime in from time to time.

"Krillin, I don't think a slingshot apparatus is going to get anybody to Namek," Chi-Chi said, leering at Krillin as he tried to mime his theory for the room.

Krillin's arms and face fell and he sat back down. "I mean, it isn't like anybody's got a better idea..." He muttered that, and Chi-Chi only got the gist of it thanks to Gohan's increasing dexterity in signing.

Krillin was saved from Goku's heart monitor being broken over his head by Bulma and Mr. Popo suddenly arriving back in the hospital room. Bulma fell gracelessly off of the flying carpet, tumbling over Chi-Chi's bed by the window and falling into a heap on the floor. She was quickly back on her feet, though - face flushed and beaming. "Guys, it's perfect," Bulma reported jubilantly. "Mr. Popo and I made it to Jupiter and back in seconds - I'll have to run some numbers to get an exact time, but we could probably get to Namek in like a month. Then we can just borrow Namek's dragon balls, wish back everybody killed by the saiyans, and be home in time to catch a movie!"

What followed was a series of whoops, clapping, and excited babbling that to Chi-Chi was incomprehensible - but she supposed she got the gist of it. Bulma started talking again, too fast for Chi-Chi to read her lips, and with too many words Gohan didn't know how to sign. After all but pulling his hair out trying to keep up with Bulma, Gohan gave up and turned to Chi-Chi, saying and signing in unison, "Could I go to space with Bulma?"

Chi-Chi took a moment to process the request before going with her gut and too-loudly proclaiming, "No - absolutely not!"

Every head in the room - save for Goku's, as he was trapped in a giant metal cocoon of medical equipment - swerved to see what she was on about. In a more level tone, Chi-Chi went on, "It has been over a year since all three of us have been together, I won't let you just immediately flounce off to space the moment this family is back together. This is something the adults can take care of. Besides, do you have any idea how much school you've missed out on? We'll have to put you on a modified schedule as it is just so you're back on track-"

"Aw, come on, Chi-Chi," Goku chimed in. Even with her semi-nonexistent hearing, Chi-Chi recognized the sing-song cadence of her husband having a critical thought. "It's just for a little over two months - Gohan could learn a lot about space n' stuff from Bulma, that's like school."

Chi-Chi squinted at Gohan's hands as he signed this to her. "You're not embellishing, are you?" she asked sharply.

"No, it's what he said - honest," swore Gohan.

"Goku, I don't appreciate you undermining me like that," Chi-Chi said, not missing a beat as she whirled on Goku.

She had a fifteen thousand word tirade prepared, but Goku was saved from the worst of Chi-Chi's ruthless tongue as Gohan tugged on the sleeve of her hospital gown, redirecting her attention. "Please, Mom," he signed, his mouth pressed into a thin, grim line. "It's my fault he's dead - I have to help bring him back."

Whatever furious words she had at the ready died in her throat. Chi-Chi heaved a sigh, her hand automatically going up to Gohan's head to play with his hair. "Very well," she said evenly. She turned her attention to Bulma next, "I can rely on you to make sure he does his studies, can't I? Going to Namek is hardly a vacation and I don't want him acting like it is."

Bulma's eyebrows rose to her hairline, a bit taken aback by Chi-Chi's sudden change of mind. "Uh, yeah. You got it," she said, giving Chi-Chi a halfhearted thumbs-up.

Satisfied, Chi-Chi turned her attention back to the half-finished sweater in her lap. She supposed she ought to be proud - even if Gohan wasn't as focused on school as he ought to be, he still had a sense of responsibility. Besides, Bulma was a literal genius and travelling through space did provide plenty of opportunities for learning. Even with all of this in mind, Chi-Chi's insides squirmed at the thought of Gohan leaving for Namek. It may very well be an uneventful jaunt to space and back, but the number of things that could go wrong was staggering. Catastrophic spaceship malfunctions aside, anything could be out there in the great beyond: magnetic storms, fluctuating gravity, toxic gas, asteroids-

_Vegeta._

The needles snapped in Chi-Chi's grip. "I'm going with," she announced to the room.

"Mom?"

"Chi-Chi?"

"It's far too risky for just Gohan and Bulma to go by themselves," Chi-Chi said plainly.

Krillin moved so that Chi-Chi could see him and read his lips. "It's cool, Chi-Chi. I'm going with 'em, too. It'll be fine."

"I'm stronger than you," Chi-Chi said, "and anything could happen."

"What about me? I don't wanna stay on Earth all by myself," Goku hollered from his steel cocoon.

Chi-Chi gave Goku her sweetest smile. "Oh, you silly thing. It's only a little over two months, you'll be fine," she said. "You might even be fully healed by the time we get back. Then we can all go home together and things can go back to normal."

Goku grumbled something that even those hearing individuals in the room couldn't make out, which Chi-Chi took as a victory. "Bulma, when do we leave?" Chi-Chi asked.

Bulma scratched her chin, considering. "Well, there are a few repairs and preparations to be made... Between a week and ten days, I'd say," Bulma said.

Chi-Chi nodded, already making a mental checklist of everything they'd need for the journey. Shampoo, socks and underwear, healthy snacks, textbooks- "Gohan, my goodness," she gasped suddenly. "It's been over a  _year_ since we've been shopping - none of your old clothes fit!"

Gohan blinked. Apparently, that hadn't even occurred to him. "Oh, uh. Yeah. I guess we'd need to take care of-"

Chi-Chi slid out of the hospital bed, not even wincing as her bones groaned in protest. "Dad, would you help me dress? We need to take care of some shopping for Gohan-"

"Right now?" asked the Ox King.

"Mom, we have a week at least-"

Chi-Chi scarcely heard either of them, but could guess the nature of their complaints well enough. "We won't have time to pack if we wait around. Where's my purse? You did bring me my purse, didn't you, Dad?"

"I don't think they'll let you leave just yet," Krillin said, tapping Chi-Chi on the shoulder to get her attention.

Chi-Chi shrugged his hand off. "Goku, we're borrowing the Nimbus," was all she said, "and before you complain, we'll bring you back a snack. How's that sound?"

"Great - have fun on the town, sweetie," Goku said, beaming. "Be good to your mother, Gohan!"

Chi-Chi found her purse by elbowing Master Roshi in the throat and knocking him over. She slung it over her shoulder, dressed haphazardly, and went over to the window. Mr. Popo narrowly avoided getting shoved himself. "Gohan, are you coming?" she asked.

Gohan hurriedly tied his other shoe, himself changed out of hospital clothes rather sloppily, and came over to the window with her. "Great," she said, before opening the window as wide as she could and bellowing out for the Nimbus.

The little yellow cloud appeared over the horizon, rapidly zigzagging around buildings until it came to a stop under the window. Chi-Chi hopped on, followed closely by Gohan, who gripped her leg for stability. Chi-Chi looked down at him, smiling fondly.

"You need a haircut, too," she said.

Gohan frowned. "A haircu-?"

His voice was drowned out as the Nimbus sped off towards the nearest barber.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i find it difficult to fathom that there are people who don't adore chi-chi and i find it even more difficult to fathom that toriyama deadass doesn't use her character for, like, anything. anyway, this is a story i'm mostly making up as i go with only my unreferenced memory of the saiyan saga plotline and my unquenchable thirst for chi-chi and specifically for chi-chi to deck someone in the face. i'm going to try to upload every sunday so we'll see how that goes!


End file.
